Doing it right...

[Sgt. Howard]

so... non-consequential age-suppression restoration then?

Essentially, yes

[Sgt. Howard]

Greg re-emerged from the kitchen and wandered over to the CD selections by the stereo system- finding what he was looking for, he placed the CD in the player and popped the 'play' button. As the cd worked up to the song, he walked to his wife and extended his hand. She looked at him quizzically until "The Girl From Ipanema" started playing- she then smiled, and stood up to Samba with her husband. He was 62, she was overweight, yet the joy they shared in the dance outweighed any perceived physical deficiencies. They clearly loved each other, and the frank sensuality of the Samba had it's effect on those in the parlor.
The unrequited love lament was not wasted on Al- he felt his desire far more keenly than ever before. Next, Neil and Phix came out and engaged in the dance... then Jin and Alan joined it.
Al stood up to better watch the spectacle- as he did so, his lower back popped! WELL! THAT hadn't happened in a few years... grabbing his right hip, he twisted his back in that direction, creating a rip of pops that sounded almost like machinegun fire! Grabbing his left hip, he did the same thing with similar results!
That hadn't happened since his days in school! On a whim, he tried his bad leg- and it felt solid, and painless! What manner of miracle was this?!?

Among special forces types, you will hear a universal praise of crickets. You will seldom hear a Ranger, or Green Beret, or SEAL or Marine Force Recon speak ill of crickets or witness any of the aforementioned killing such a creature- for good reason.
When you insert yourself in wild country, crickets shut up as you move in... then they regain their voices after you have been still long enough. You learn to hear each section as a singular voice, to recognize where they are in relation to you.

When one group falls silent, there is an intruder. The warning can save your life.

Al was watching the dance when he became aware that the chatter around him... the human and paranormal 'crickets' as it were... fell silent. Using his peripheral vision, he noticed that those around him were either looking AT him... or someone BEHIND him.

He had been ambushed.

Turning, he saw Daisy, in human, looking very expectantly towards him.
The next CD opened up with George Strait

"I don't want to be the kind to hesitate, be too shy, wait too late,
I don't care what they say other lovers do- I just want to dance with you,"

Whether he took her out to the dance floor or she took him- neither one remembered and neither one cared. He remembered the Samba from years gone by and she either had some time at it prior or simply learned very quickly. It didn't matter. Some would consider the dance wrong with a C&W song, but the timing was spot on and the results were splendid. Kathy and Buck joined the festivities...and soon, many couples were trotting to the music in one fashion or another.

I got a feeling that you have a heart like mine
So, let it show, let it shine
If we have a chance to make one heart of two
I just want to dance with you

He knew this was a set-up... and he didn't care in the least.
Yes, this was his family.

[Sgt. Howard]

Tina is a most exceptional barista indeed, if she can splice coffee.

Only if you spill it on your designer genes...

{deposits a microtome and a thesis paper from Watson and Crick in the pun vault...}

Actually Rosalita is doing the splicing and she uses a fid knife

(Deposits a Monkey's fist shot line into the pun vault)

[lake_wrangler]

so... non-consequential age-suppression restoration then?

They could tell you with more authority, but if I recall, taken in small doses, the elixir won't fully rejuvenate, but will definitely heal. So Al's leg will no longer be a problem, and he will be able to dance divinely (as long as he doesn't step on anyone's toes, including his own...)

[Sgt. Howard]

Several dances later, Al and Daisy stepped out onto the back veranda to talk- the air was quite crisp, the leaves were in full turn. Harvest had come and the ancient night of Samhain approached- that time when the wall between the living and the dead was most permeable. Al looked around at the spectacle and mused...
"How perfectly appropriate- in the Autumn of my life I find my harvest... and I have to admit, I am rather surprised to find myself attracted outside my own species," he thought for a bit, "does that make me prejudiced?"
"All sentient creatures are prejudiced in one form or another... I kept hearing myself think, 'but he is HUMAN!'... and yes, Kat and Buck make it look easy, but Buck was bound and determined to meet Kat- he spent MONTHS turning himself into a human... that is, mastering the human diet, learning clothing, modesty, customs and such,"
"I seem to recall quite a bit of issue with... diet... your human form can digest meat, right?"
"Yes... but when we revert to centaur, we have a digestive tract designed to process vast bulk of grasses and seeds to extract what little nourishment there is- rich proteins and cholesterols play havoc with such a system. Conversely, when we DO a proper feed of grasses and such, in human, the elimination of such is not... realistic... in fact, is quite dangerous,"
"Oh good God- I had not even considered that! So, in essence, you have to ... I guess the word, 'saturate' would apply... if you were to stay 'human' for any length of time?"
"Yes... and learn to eat meat... ugh!(she involuntarily shivered)... ours is a delicate system dedicated to plant life,"
"Whereas the human animal has the gastronomical discernment of a dustbin... (she laughed)... yes, I see the issue- yet, there are human vegetarians, I imagine such a diet would be easier to acclimate to,"
"Except that it really isn't healthy to this body to forgo meat. Centaurs are an abnormality- our eyes are those of a predator, yet our digestive tract is that of prey,"
"Another ponder I had not considered... bah! Listen to us... two wandering souls tripping over each other, finally making the connection, and we are discussing eating and bowel habits... (she snickered) ... such a romantic couple we are. But on to other things- I assume you are widowed?"
"Yes- Rock blew a coronary some years back... it was quick for him. One moment, every bit as powerful and alert as ever, then he toppled over... (sigh)... he never 'went to pasture' as you humans call it... probably wouldn't want to anyway,"
"Heart attack? THAT's not common among your kind, is it?"
"Any more than five pounds of bacon every day, but he couldn't wolf it down fast enough... and he always stunk of it... it created this smell that saturated his sweat...ugh (she shivered again)... totally disgusting,"
"FIVE POUNDS OF BACON?!? No WONDER he had a heart attack- humans cannot deal with that without harm,"
"What about you?"
"Me? Well, I enjoy bacon as much as anyone else, I suppose, but NOT FIVE POUNDS worth in one setting,"
She giggle- "No, silly- was there ever a 'Mrs. Richer'?"
"Oh ( he chuckled) ... hmm... no, there were several close calls, but never one where I actually 'tied the knot' as it were... after all, being a professional soldier seldom allows much of a family life and usually produces widows and orphans on a wholesale basis... I never saw the need,"
They had been walking during this conversation, and found themselves at a turn in the brook that ran through the property to the lake. A small beach of sorts presented itself with an overlooking grass covered mound- standing on the beach, the house was no longer visible. Checking his position, Al saw the 'tactical advantage' of the setting- then grinned to his hostess-
"This was not a random selection of setting, was it?"
"Of course not- I could care less who watches me kiss, but you humans like your privacy as I understand it,"
Guiding her mouth towards his, he replied-

"You understand correctly,"

[TazManiac]

so... non-consequential age-suppression restoration then?

They could tell you with more authority, but if I recall, taken in small doses, the elixir won't fully rejuvenate, but will definitely heal. So Al's leg will no longer be a problem, and he will be able to dance divinely (as long as he doesn't step on anyone's toes, including his own...)

Ah, now that you mention it, Katherine in the Hospital comes to mind...

[Hansontoons]

Tina is a most exceptional barista indeed, if she can splice coffee.

Only if you spill it on your designer genes...

{deposits a microtome and a thesis paper from Watson and Crick in the pun vault...}

Actually Rosalita is doing the splicing and she uses a fid knife

(Deposits a Monkey's fist shot line into the pun vault)

They are relatively easy to make, created this one as a key fob. Inside the "fist" is a Pachinko ball.

[Sgt. Howard]

There were a few more dances after Al and Daisy left the house, then things settled back to normal... well, what would be normal for here... Greg and Neil sat in a corner with Anna and Phix, Neil telling Greg as much as he knew about Greg's mother and his own bloodline. Jin and Alan sat back and enjoyed the quiet... Alan kept reaching over and touching Jin's belly... Buck and Kathy sat back with Rowdy and Cindy while Castela 'flew' her corn husk maiden all over the room and Atsali quietly watched the activities. Kevin wandered towards the kitchen to see about a cup of coffee, and Tina and Stanley appeared at the back door, slightly disheveled and giggling. Shelly and Justin were gathering plates (in spite of the maid's protests) to buss them to the kitchen.
Suddenly, the three centaurs swiveled and cocked their ears towards the back door- on Rowdy and Cindy, this didn't look too odd as centaurs have equine ears. Bucks rather human ears did attract attention, as their independent movement is NOT what they were designed for. All three looked out the door, smiled, and continued with what they were doing.
"What was that?" Kath asked.
"Momma's happy," Buck smiled.
A little while later, several individuals went out to enjoy the weather before it turned completely foul. Greg was talking to Buck about getting measurements of torsos and arms in their native form when again, all three of Daisy's children swiveled their ears, looked out the door, and smiled. Kath asked again- "What was that?"
Again, Buck responded, "Momma's happy,"
Greg was a little confused by this, as was Kath, but he continue with a tape measure to get critical dimensions of Cindy's and Rowdy's arms.
A third time, only fifteen minutes later, all three looked in the same direction and smiled. Rowdy commented, "Damn- I never knew any human had that in him! And he's not a young man,"
"He's inspired," giggled Cindy,"
"Buck," Kath asked, "What's going on?"
Buck turned to Kathy and quietly said, "Momma's getting her bones rolled... and apparently, by a rather... talented... fellow,"
Kathy blush furiously, covered her mouth staring at Buck with wide eyes- "THREE TIMES?!? in SHORT ORDER?!?"
Greg picked up on this- "How is that even possible?"
"Ask Neil," Cindy offered, "There was something in Al's coffee,"

[Sgt. Howard]

Actually Rosalita is doing the splicing and she uses a fid knife

(Deposits a Monkey's fist shot line into the pun vault)

They are relatively easy to make, created this one as a key fob. Inside the "fist" is a Pachinko ball.

Nudge ought to learn that knot... for the next assailant...

[lake_wrangler]

Buck and Kathy sat back with Rowdy and Cindy while Atsali 'flew' her corn husk maiden all over the room and Atsali quietly watched the activities.

Kathy blush furiously, covered her mouth staring at Buck with wide eyes- "THREE TIMES?!? in SHORT ORDER?!?"
Greg picked up on this- "How is that even possible?"
"Ask Neil," Cindy offered, "There was something in Al's coffee,"

More than just healing, then, I guess...

[Sgt. Howard]

Buck and Kathy sat back with Rowdy and Cindy while Atsali 'flew' her corn husk maiden all over the room and Atsali quietly watched the activities.

Kathy blush furiously, covered her mouth staring at Buck with wide eyes- "THREE TIMES?!? in SHORT ORDER?!?"
Greg picked up on this- "How is that even possible?"
"Ask Neil," Cindy offered, "There was something in Al's coffee,"

More than just healing, then, I guess...

"Be fruitful and multiply,"

[Sgt. Howard]

Greg went directly back to where Neil and Phix sat... the little one was quietly nursing.
"Neil- did you put something in Al's coffee?"
Neil looked a little taken aback- "Actually, yes I did- I figured it couldn't... hurt him,"
"What did you give him?"
"Three drops of elixir- heals most wounds, re-invigorates, extends the lifespan and serves as an all-around tonic,"
"Sounds like a patent medicine ad- but this stuff is what YOU use to stay alive, right?"
"Yes,"
Greg looked at him for a bit, mulling something over in his mind...
"Spare another three drops?"

Thymbris sat in her quarters, expanding her mind as a normal part of her daily regimen. Billions of minds on this planet, each one with billions of thoughts, each one blindly living within the narrow confines of their short existence. Very little escaped her notice... not that she was all that intrusive, as much as she was curious about the human condition. Hatred in particular fascinated her... mostly because she couldn't understand it. There had been powerfully hateful minds over the millennia, and usually of those in power who had used hatred to goad people into doing unspeakable horror. Entire dynasties were founded and ruled by hatred... only to crumble of their own weight... for hatred, like fire, can only exist if there is something to destroy... then it destroys itself.
A particular mind tripped her attention- one consumed with blind, screaming hatred and the will to exterminate those it hated. She studied it at length, trying to understand why it hated. The mind would not even consider the question... she looked further...
A man... locked in a concrete cell... devoid of companionship for reasons he found unacceptable... plotting the demise of many for reasons of vengeance. The bulk of his intended victims never even knew of his existence, but their death was to punish two others who had thwarted his plans. So perfectly odd, yet so very precise in his planning. She came to understand that several had already gotten killed or injured in this effort- that troubled the man not at all. He was remarkably selfish with his life and consequently gave little thought to anybody else's. He had no idea that he would answer for this, even though he had been told many times by many people that this was the case.
Very odd... she 'tagged' the fellow that she might find him easier at a later date...

The streets around Brian's Auto repair business started showing a new life. Several of the troublemakers that used to be a blight on the neighborhood were nowhere to be found while others seemed to turn a new leaf and become a useful part of the community. A group of local teens asked Mr. Wahnee if they could do a mural on his shop wall to cover the graffiti that offended everybody- he even bought the paint. Those that lived there started sprucing up their homes and keeping the sidewalks and street clean. Junked cars got hauled. An investor bought the abandoned warehouse and renovated it into a 'Pizza Factory' franchise with a videogame arcade. People looking for drugs had to go elsewhere. Another small industrial operation that lay vacant for years became an outlet for motorized bicycle kits... soon these obnoxious, noisy claptraptions were everywhere, getting amused looks from everyone while providing cheap transportation and thrills for those who indulged. Not long afterwards, the local laws allowed them on the streets PROVIDED they were titled and licensed as 'mopeds' and the driver had a License to drive- other than a helmet, that was all required. Some of the Hispanics got absolutely crazy with design and frame modification, and soon afterwards it became a tourist attraction. When a little puppy dog got lost, the whole neighborhood mobilized to find the critter... then plotted a 'end of season BBQ' when they found him- NOT to cook the dog, but to become better neighbors.
Brian was rather impressed with the changes he saw.

[Warrl]

That next-to-last paragraph sounds like a several-month time-skip...

[jwhouk]

Things happen quickly in the Twin Cities. (That's our story, and we're stickin' to it.)

---

Hans was out for his daily one-hour rec time in the ACU. He wasn't allowed in the dayroom of the complex, because of his last little "outburst." Dunno what was so bad about it, he thought. The guy recovered, eventually.

There was no one in the rec room with him. A screen was up on the wall, behind plexiglass, showing the U of M game. That was more Maurice's thing, he thought. He was the bookie on Block C.

He went over to the desk window. The chute was open, which meant that he had mail. He reached in, and pulled out an envelope that had been already opened - obviously.

He pressed the call button, after seeing that the envelope was the only thing in the chute. He didn't bother to watch as it slid back into the wall.

The return address had a Wisconsin DOC logo on it - and the facility name "Racine Youthful Offender Correctional Facility." Huh, he thought. He got assigned quick...

He took out the form letter that was inside.

Dear Mr. Tempelhoffer,

This letter is to inform you that your son, Mikael Tempelhoffer, has been placed on administrative confinement for violating Wisconsin DOC administrative code, aiding and abetting causing the death of another, battery to staff, and attempted escape.

He smirked a bit. They'll never be able to pin anything on him. Hell, he didn't know the staff's real name, so...

Because of his failure to comply with investigations, the department made the decision to refer the case to Federal investigators, as it involves extortion and murder for hire across state lines. He will be remanded to the Federal Penitentiary System, with charges of conspiracy to commit murder.

This caused his eyebrow to raise. The Feds? They'd been bugging him for weeks, and his lawyers were sure they wouldn't be able to pin that bounty stuff...

Since one of the individuals involved in the charges is from Texas, he will be moved to the United States Penitentiary in Beaumont, Texas.

On the screen, a Minnesota Gopher receiver dropped a short-out pass. His face dropped even more.

Beaumont was where Garcia Hermando was located. And after he had ordered Hermando's nephew executed five years ago, he'd had a hit out on him - and his family.

His dumb son had gotten caught up in the sting that surrounded that idiot Malcroft - why anyone had wasted ammo on him, he still didn't know - but his lawyers and "helpers" had done their best to keep him out.

But now, the Feds had their hooks in him. And if he went to Beaumont... it'd be a death sentence.

[lake_wrangler]

Hmm... The tables are turned? Now one who is close to him is being targeted?

Interestingly, I had forgotten about Thymbris' job... Tagged for easier recollection... Ha! Wonder how soon that will happen...

[FreeFlier]

Actually Rosalita is doing the splicing and she uses a fid knife

(Deposits a Monkey's fist shot line into the pun vault)

They are relatively easy to make, created this one as a key fob. Inside the "fist" is a Pachinko ball.

Nudge ought to learn that knot... for the next assailant...

It's a variation on the Turk's Head . . . you need a considerable length of line and there aren't any sharp bends.

The bowline was a better choice.

--FreeFlier

[DinkyInky]

It's a variation on the Turk's Head . . . you need a considerable length of line and there aren't any sharp bends.

The bowline was a better choice.

--FreeFlier

Yes, especially if they're 작은 자지...which most guys like that usually are.

[Sgt. Howard]

It's a variation on the Turk's Head . . . you need a considerable length of line and there aren't any sharp bends.

The bowline was a better choice.

--FreeFlier

Yes, especially if they're 작은 자지...which most guys like that usually are.

- is the Yiddish for 작은 자지 translate as 'Putz'?

[Sgt. Howard]

Dr. David Cummings, having just finished residency in trauma, arrived at Abbot Medical ED for his first day of duty as a full-fledged practitioner. He was looking forward to 'Big Town' emergency work... and couldn't wait to get experience. He had gone through the interview process, taken the orientation, spoken with all of his new colleagues and now wanted to 'fight the good fight'.
Walking into change-of-shift, he noticed animated discussions among Doctors and Nurses, NAs and Anesthesia Providers. Quickly, Dr. Ted Mallone pulled him aside and started to explain-
"We've got something totally new here, with no explanations but plenty of patterns,"
"Disease?"
"Injury- one of the OR scrub techs dubbed it 'Pretzel Penis Complex'- we've had fourteen patients so far with their penis literally TIED IN A KNOT!"
Dr. Cummings looked at him, trying to see if he would be sent for sterile fallopian tubes next.
"I am supposed to believe this?" he asked.
"BELIEVE THIS!!!- We've come up with a protocol that works, but you have to be quick because damage sets in quickly, and necrosis to devascularization is not a pretty picture. WE had difficulty believing it even when we were looking at it... and here's the thing- EVERY PATIENT WITH THIS COMPLAINT SO FAR IS A REGISTERED SEX FELON! WITHOUT FAIL!!!"
"Retribution?"
"That still doesn't explain the HOW... we do have a protocol for treatment- load a 20 cc syringe with K-Y jelly, mount a dull portal 18 gauge needle and inject between the flesh to allow it to untie itself- then immediately pack with ice. Then call the police,"
"Don't they KNOW what happened?"
"Well... two of them talked about a 'Giant Goat Lady', the others aren't talking,"
"Hallucinogenics?"
"Toxicology comes back clean,"
"Dr. Mallone? We have another one," stated a Nurse who had poked her head into the staff room. Mallone turned to Cummings and said, "Come with me,"
In trauma 1, a patient was on the gurney, whining in pain while rocking in a near full fetal position. With considerable help and effort, they straightened him out and pulled down his pants.

His penis was tied around the base of his scrotum in a clove hitch. Everything had turned black.

Cummings fainted dead away.


The evening meal was the standard raucous affair, with the little one scampering all over the pace while Kath tried to keep order. Al seemed to walk with a perceivable swagger, as opposed to the standard limp that normally announced his presence. The Grand Dam of the house, Daisy, clopped about with a beaming shine to her already cheery disposition. Tina took one look at her and snickered. Buck, Cindy, Rowdy and Greg watched her display of satisfaction- Greg was bemused, the others satisfied. Shelly and Justin were in deep conversation over in the corner, barely touching their plates. Atsali was, of course, moody- that was pretty much the norm for her anymore. Jin was showing off the very beginnings of a bump to anyone who would talk to her, and there were few who didn't. Alan followed, beaming with pride. Edward had his hands full- a job that require a 'Ringmaster' more than a Butler was his estimation of his lot. Annie was in conversation with Tina and Stanley, both girls giggling on occasion. Neil looked at the situation with Dixie in one arm and Phix on the other-
"I have quite a family," he stated.
"WE have quite a family," she corrected.

[lake_wrangler]

Well, he sure got to see what "'Big Town' emergency work" looked like, didn't he...

[nitpick]

Atsali was, of course, moody- that was pretty much the norm for her anymore.

Isn't "anymore" usually used in a negative manner? Like "she didn't display much else in way of emotions, anymore" or "she didn't display any other emotion, anymore". In the current sentence, you might consider replacing "anymore" with "nowadays", or something similar (which then fits the rest of the sentence without having to modify the rest of it.)
[/nitpick]

Meanwhile, I have to admit that I hadn't thought of the repercussions of Nudge's vigilantism... It's nice to see that you have thought it through and made it believable (once again).
And this concludes our praise sandwich post for today...
Of course, I want you to know that the "praise bread" is quite genuine...