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Yeah, but in my case, I had a feeling the whole time that I wouldn't end up asking her out, just because she clearly hasn't stopped being bitter about her ex, even though they split a while back. Like, before last year, probably even back in '15.

So, really, I got what I expected: Confirmation of my suspicion that she's the type to think every guy out there is incapable of being faithful or dependable... Even after I'd let slip that I'd never cheated on someone, and as long as I'm employed I make sure I have my bills paid, such as they are.

She shared a post that said something like "Where are all the men who can cook, wear their pants properly, pay their bills, and remain faithful? We'll wait." Pretty much implying that no guys are capable of doing those things. No, the reason girls who are making those kinds of complaints can't find the kind of guy they want is because they either ignore those guys or chase them off by insulting them before learning anything about them.

That, or they're only looking for guys in trailer parks/housing projects.

This is a generalization, but trying to help insecure needy people out of their trouble by hooking up with them won't make you a hero, and often will leave you more fucked up yourself. Seen it over and over.

Paraphrasing one of Runyon's laws, Never sleep with anyone who's got more trouble than you.

A student was meditating with his instructor, and asked "Master, what is the secret to happiness in life?"

After a moment, the instructor responds "By making good decisions."

The student ponders this as he continues to meditate, then asks "And how do you make good decisions?"

To which the instructor replies "Experience."

And after meditating upon this one-word koan of knowledge, he further asks "And how does one get experience?"

The instructor's final reply was simply "By making poor decisions and learning from them."

I wasn't expecting to help her with her problems, actually. I just figured, since I try to avoid being anything like her ex, it could have worked out. But since she's still so hung up on how he acted that she's continuing to say that all guys are horrible (knowing full well that isn't true), it's much better to just not even bother.

Shneekey's Guidelines to Live By:

#12: Don't stick it in crazy

ShneekeyTheLost wrote:Shneekey's Guidelines to Live By:

#12: Don't stick it in crazy

But... Crazy girls are committed!

Aside from harping on about her ex every other week (my sister was the one posting misandrist crap the remaining weeks), she seemed okay. Though, honestly, it isn't like I really thought that I'd actually ask her out, or that she'd ever say yes. I just got tired of seeing that crap, and the mood I had been in over the weekend was the opposite of helpful.

Another thing to take note of; People will say “why are guys so crappy” as opposed to “why are so many guys so crappy” for the sake of expediency. They also generalize like this because the whole point is to call attention to the numerous problems that are present in our society, specifically the gender inequality, sexual harassment, rape culture, and other such things that, while they do indeed go both ways, these issues are overwhelmingly ones that women are the victim to, and also victims are very frequently blamed as opposed to the actual perpetrators.

Equality in complaints will probably happen once Men and women are equally affected by these sorts of problems.

Also, a warning: yes, men are sexually harassed; yes, men are raped; yes, men sometimes get paid less or are less likely to be hired to a job assuming all other things are equal; but if someone /only/ brings these facts up in the middle of discussions about women facing these challenges, it’s likely that they are not really trying to call attention to how men face these problems but are doing so in order to de-legitimize and call attention away from the female victims.

Yes, it’s fine to discuss how men face these problems, but not at the expense of discussing how women face these problems (and how they face these problems far more frequently).

GlytchMeister wrote:Yes, it’s fine to discuss how men face these problems, but not at the expense of discussing how women face these problems (and how they face these problems far more frequently).

Agreed. I've heard that called the "Whatabout?" evasion... also "false equivalence". For example, women point out (quite rightfully) that they're usually paid less than men doing the same job, and are much less likely to be promoted into senior management positions, and somebody says "Well, what about company XYZ, which was founded by four women and still doesn't have any men in the Board of Directors?"

The tactic falsely implies that the problems are equal in both directions, hence equivalent, and thus that the original issue is really a non-issue because "they do it too." It's a cheap but often-effective way of dodging meaningful discussion.

There's a lot of this going on in political discourse these days... not a new thing but it seems to have gotten worse.

- Contact the Gal of Interest, outside of Social Media & arrange an 'In Real Life' get-together. Say, Coffee. <snerk>, OK; Tea or Cocoa...), Hell,

"c'mon over; I'm making samaches..."

- Let her vent all she wants to, Listen. Do Not Fix Anything.

- Communicate your expectations, even if they are- "I'm a bit without Human Contact right now and thought we might benefit from each other".
In your own words.

later on down the road you'll have been that guy who jumps out in the middle of her ranting about the Slings & Arrows of Outrageous Fortune...
(except for that One Guy, the One Time...).

You could be that guy.

ShneekeyTheLost wrote:Shneekey's Guidelines to Live By:

#12: Don't stick it in crazy

Rephrased: "Never Do It with anyone crazier than you are."

Of course, as a friend who was recovering from a Bad Experience meditated, that means almost nobody ever Gets Any, because ONE of you is almost certain to be crazier than the other...

AnotherFairportfan wrote:

ShneekeyTheLost wrote:Shneekey's Guidelines to Live By:

#12: Don't stick it in crazy

Rephrased: "Never Do It with anyone crazier than you are."

Of course, as a friend who was recovering from a Bad Experience meditated, that means almost nobody ever Gets Any, because ONE of you is almost certain to be crazier than the other...

Could be rephrased as "don't do it with anyone you're sure is crazier than you are".

If you aren't sure which one of the two of you is crazier, it may be a good match. Although it's sometimes helpful if the two of you are crazy in different ways, so you can each be the other's stabilizer.

Or, better yet: "Make sure their kind of crazy matches your kind of crazy," to somewhat paraphrase a line from Deadpool. As long as I'm sure a woman wouldn't be the sort to get violent or continuously accuse me of things I haven't and wouldn't do, I'd probably be okay. Hell, I would even be brave enough to date a yandere type of girl, if it were possible to keep her craziness in check, though I suspect that most of the time, it isn't.

On a completely unrelated note, I had to call in sick for the first time. Sore throat, headache, and I think I'm developing a fever. Thankfully, aside from being allowed to leave early last night because of the snow and ice, I'd never missed a day, so my attendance is still good.

Dad brought home some Chinese food, and my fortune cookie says: An enjoyable vacation is awaiting you on an island.

Urgently decline any offers for a three hour boat tour.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=avaSdC0QOUM

Wear headphones if coworkers/children are present.

Alkarii wrote:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=avaSdC0QOUM

Wear headphones if coworkers/children are present.

I could only endure to time mark 1:54, but I see the funny...

Yeah, I only like one part of that song, where T-Pain, aka the guy who autotunes his voice because he can't sing, mentions shtoinking a mermaid.

Some of their other stuff is pretty funny, though.

Edit: Though, something like this would be more my speed.

TazManiac wrote:

Alkarii wrote:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=avaSdC0QOUM

Wear headphones if coworkers/children are present.

I could only endure to time mark 1:54, but I see the funny...

I more or less forced myself to watch it to the end... really didn't care for it...Don't care for swearing up and down every second or third word, nor am I impressed by the "prestige" and the upscale lifestyle implied by the song.

Even if I won the lottery (which I won't, since I don't play it, to begin with...), I still wouldn't go for that kind of stuff...

Heck, I'd finish improving my bicycle, and I wouldn't worry about running out of money on a bicycle trip, but I wouldn't go for the high image stuff. A small house out in the country, with a barn or shed I can work on projects and such, but that's about it... I don't need people looking at me, whether in awe or not... I like being anonymous and/or behind the scenes (which is ironic, since part of what I do is rather visible, to the right people... But anyway...)

Yeah. Definitely not my kind of music and song...

Yeah... I'm not fond of boats, actually. I only linked it because of the comment about going on a boat.

Also, since all I really need to do at this point to go full time is make a phone call and do some paperwork, I'm gonna see if I can go work in the sub assembly area. I did fairly well when they had me work in there last week, for my first time.

Mainly because I don't like how they changed up my station recently, and now it's all cluttered and I keep winding up having to do orders for the night light seats. (Trust me, if you knew how much crap I had to put up with tonight because of them, when I haven't even started working on them, you'd understand why I wish they'd sell so poorly that they'd get discontinued.)

And thus begins the longest week of my life to date.

For the first time, ever, I will be uprooting myself and moving completely out of the state of my birth, to end up six states away.

Oh, and guess what's in store for the 715 tomorrow morning? About six inches of SNOW.