Doing it right...

[DinkyInky]

Rof mao

[Dave]

(Places a half-melted Carrington Event commemorative medallion into the Pun Jar)

[jwhouk]

Billens looked at the blueprints on the shop, even as Glytch was crawling along the innards, adjusting some controls.

"Uh, Glytch? A moment?"

There was no immediate response.

"GLYTCH!" A head popped out of the cab of the behemoth.

"Oh, hey, Billens! I was just finishing up..."

"GET DOWN HERE. NOW."

Glytch could hear the irritation in the agent's voice. He clambered down the makeshift ladder that they'd pulled off a Model JX-5999 Combine, onto the platform from a TX-998 Trailer, and took the small set of stairs down to ground level.

"We're probably about 24 hours from being completely operational," Glytch said brightly.

"Son, would you care to explain to me and my cohort here what exactly the purpose of this machine is?" Billens motioned to a very large looking gentleman, with a brown coat, broad chest and thick legs - who looked at Glytch with the eyes of a crossed principal who just found his car had been toilet-papered in the school parking lot.

"I explained this to Al and Buck this morning: this contraption will be have a directed electromagnetic pulse generator with a destructive-interference safe zone that matches the dimensions of the A Mill," he said, his voice suddenly cold. "When activated, it will destroy any and all unshielded electronics outside the safe zone and inside the effective range."

The agent and the bulky man both raised their eyebrows.

"It will kill communications, unshielded vehicles with computers, and anything else that has a circuit board."

"And the effective range?" The large man asked.

"As far as across the street!" Glytch's smile returned.

"Son, you do know what is across the street from A-Mill, correct?" Glytch was frowning a bit at this newcomer.

"Uh, I'm from Peoria, so..."

"The Main Power Transformer that leads to DOWNTOWN MINNEAPOLIS." The large gentleman leaned down and looked him directly in the eye. "You try and operate that thing on that street corner, and HALF THE TWIN CITIES will be without power. And I don't care WHAT my nephew says, you are NOT doing that sort of thing with anything MY department puts together."

He pressed his rather longish nose right into the face of the hooded youngster.

"Understand?"

Glytch stood there, frozen, unable to reply at all.

"This here is Calvin Edward Alexander. He's the head of Alexander Harvester's Research and Development. His family and I go way back." Billens turned and looked at Glytch. "You might wanna dial back your contraption a bit, kid."

[jwhouk]

(Yes, he's Ebbie Calvin's direct descendant. His has always been the techy one in the family. Buck's side has been more into production.)

[Just Old Al]

ROFLMAO...

Good catch, Billens!

[Sgt. Howard]

Well done.....

[Just Old Al]

The dinner bell rang in the kitchen, and the residents of Club Alexander trickled into the dining room. Greg and Neil came in speaking in low tones and took their places with at one end of the dinner table, Miss Annie and Phix to their respective sides with Aeterna in a playpen off to the side. Al sat across from them cuddling-close to Daisy as had become his wont. Glytch, a more respectable distance away sat to his other side across from Atsali, as had become his wont as well.

Pickle, next to Atsali kept up her customary stream of chatter to her mother and Buck. Though their home was steps away, they too joined dinner with the refugees from the vendetta – which had become so much more.

The rest of the dinner group was an ever-changing patchwork of faces. Alan and Jin were always there, as were Stan and Tina after their daily routine. Officer Epimetheus and Shelley were there, of course, neither saying much as they ate. Acacia and Brandi were often there, as were Lily and Billens when their duties permitted.

Tonight was a packed house – everyone was in including Billens, who had decided to stay for dinner having returned the LTD to the local MIB office.

“So, what have you lot been doing all day while I’ve been running about with Glytch and Billens?” Al, having been out and about, had missed his usual morning intelligence briefing and was hoping to catch up over the wonderful savoury stew and fresh bread Rosalita had conjured from the kitchen.

“Other than lolling about satisfying our wives and eating peeled grapes from nubile slaves?” Neil said in his flawless Latin then grinned, defusing the warning look Phix shot him from her place at the table. Switching to English, he said “Actually, we’ve got a lot to talk about, Al, so listen up. We know you went to the A-Mill today and we’re going to want to get your impressions before we do an analysis of the photo information you brought back. I believe Glytch has cued the photos up on his computer so we can examine them?”

“Haven’t yet, but I have the SD card and it’s a matter of a few minutes to do that when you want them.” Glytch continued eating and chatting with Atsali, not at all oblivious to the warning looks Buck was spearing him with from across the table. “I wish he’d relax”, Glytch thought. “Atsali is beautiful, but she is a friend – and I don’t hit on friends. More the point, she trusts me, and I’d never violate that.”

Neil continued with his dinner briefing, which had become a regular feature of meals at Club Alexander With the pressure of time and schedules of training, work, activities and just plain life the only time most of them were together was at the evening meal – which had become the de-facto group meeting.

“Greg and I are already up with this as is Glytch, but I’m not sure you know. We’ve identified the new strongman who’s taken over Tempelhoffer’s organization and is hammering down the rivals – and he’s a golem named Nodaki Bolethius.”

Al interrupted. “Golem? What’s a golem, mate? Only reference I have for the term is traditional Judaic writing of clay men activated by a scroll.” Al puzzled at this – they hadn’t annoyed anyone else, had they?

“You’re actually close – but they’re not Judaic they’re Lanthian." Neil knew that would be good for a rise – after the incidents Neil had heard of he knew Al was gun-shy of Lanthan anything – and especially their technology.

“Lanthan? Oh, goddess – what kind of craziness are we dealing with now?”

Neil continued, ignoring the amused looks from the far end of the table.

“The Lanthians - - Jin’s mother Mayahuel specifically – worked out the technology and secrets to creating an immortal clay being – by mixing the ashes of one dead with clay and using a method we don’t know to create an immortal being from it.”

“OK – so golems are zombies? This is starting to sound like a bad film at the cinema – and I did NOT sign up to fight the undead. OW!” Al rubbed the back of his head – which had been the victim of a collision with the back of Acacia Budur’s hand.

“Let me put it to you this way – I would sincerely not suggest making any disparaging statements about golems – as there are two of them having dinner with you.” Brandi waved from the far end of the table, and Al, never stupid but merely thick made the connection rapidly.

“Apologies, dear ladies. The only statement I can make in my defense is that I am newly come to this land you inhabit, where everything from elves to golems exists. It’s a bit jarring.” Acacia gave Al a hug as mute acceptance for his apology, and returned to her place and continued eating.

Neil harrumphed and continued his narrative. “Now, where was I? Yes, we have a golem – essentially indestructible. He’s pulling together the remains of Tempelhoffer’s organization and has had no trouble killing off the rivals who would carve off pieces. In short, while Joe and the MIB removed the head by taking down Tempelhoffer, the vendetta is still on and worse – we have no lever there.”

“We’re not sure what the golem wants, unless it is the control of both normal and paranormal sides of this area. He knows of us, we think, and knows that we’re not a bunch of scared mortals huddling like rabbits in a burrow. We think he’s got a pretty good idea of what he’s up against.”

Al nodded, and Greg picked up the narrative. “No matter what ,it’s not looking like they’ll try for us here. The attempts on Shelley’s Dad have dropped off the radar – no one’s insane enough to try for him, even the crack heads. The last big incident was the explosion .. sorry to bring it up.”

Al had been quietly smothering the memory of his lost shop. He’d stopped by the storage building while at the plant – the contents of the back shop were still pristine, but the mangled shards of was had been his life in the front shop, office and apartment were a pathetically small section of the building.

“No difficulty here. Please continue.” Al moved closer to Daisy, who had been desultorily picking at a salad. She hugged him to her, and felt his tension ease. Greg’s narrative continued.

“We’re in a state of grace right now – and we need to use it to our best effectiveness. Bolethius is still consolidating his power base – doubtful that this will take him all that long but till he does he’s not at strength to try anything. So, we need to use this to our advantage – gathering intel, recon and figuring out what that malignancy is up to.”

“Good to know. This way we have time to get our acts together for when they try us again. Greg, what’s up with your Centaur peashooters?”

“The first of the order was bench tested – it worked perfectly. The rest will soon be ready, as will be the clips and ammunition stocks. Sturm, Ruger is handling it all.”

“Can they get us replacement ammo stocks, or do you have a source for it? The TCI is getting through what we brought and we need more.”

“No problem. I will get them to source a supply of the .303, 7.62 and 8MM all those old bolters use and whatever else they need. They can tack it onto the bill and I’ll float it for now.”

“Thanks – I am in the process of starting the claims work on my business – but my cash flow is nonexistent right now. You’ll have to spot me on my share of the TCI’s cartridge bill.”

Daisy spoke up, startling all of them. With the business being discussed at the table she rarely spoke – the whole prospect of having to fight for their lives had been taking a toll on the confident, sassy dam she’d been. “Don’t worry about costs. Between us we have more money than most small countries in this family – we’ll manage the finances.”

“Thank you, love.” Al abandoned his dinner and wrapped his arms around Daisy and they settled into each other.

“Then I guess the next item on the agenda is the A-Mill recon I did today with Glytch and Billens.” Al bellowed down the table to Billens, who pulled up a chair and joined the conversation.

“We went is as Billens, Chase & Sanborn. Glytch and I were supposed to be building inspectors.”

“Chase and Sanborn? You didn’t. PLEASE tell me you didn’t.”

Glytch, also tuned in, was trying to figure out the significance of the names and why the older heads around the table were laughing. He pulled out his phone, remote linked to his crawler factory, fired one off and it returned data in a few seconds. He looked at the advertisements and suddenly realized what Billens had done, starting to laugh as heartily as the rest. He hated not getting jokes the old folks came up with.

“The site is a horrible mess. The studios and public spaces in the North View are nowhere near finished, and the loft residences are half-done even though some of them are occupied. The ground floor is a mess of half-finished construction and is essentially uninhabitable and will be that way till Spring if I’m worth my bottle.”

The South View and WH2 are better, but not by much. The public spaces are still unfinished, and they’ve been having water problems – sandbags and concrete shuttering everywhere damming dried up water channels. They haven’t cleaned up yet.

So who’s going to tell the bride?”

There was a distinct lack of enthusiasm, and Phix finally said resignedly “I’ll tell her later. Let me get a glass of wine or two into her first. “

Al continued. “The layout is much as we expected the public space to be – I have photos of all of this. There’s a balcony facing to the outside in the public space – it’s a double-height space in the corridor, with a balcony to the smaller event/performance spaces above. That will be very handy indeed. But we can discuss details when we go through the imagery I brought back and gave to Glytch. Really, that’s about all there is to it.”

Neil nodded – it was much as he had expected. “One more item to deal with, and the couch and the fireplace are calling me. Glytch!”

Glytch started, acting like he had been alone in the room rather than in the middle of a conference. “Yes, Neil?” he said with his best whipped-puppy look on his face.

“That…thing…you built at the Alexander R&D facility today. I want you to go back there tomorrow.”

Glytch picked up – this was perfect. “Great! We’re maybe 24 hours from operational with it…”

“No.”

“No?”

“Hades, no. Utterly no. Unequivocally no. No way in the river Styx do I want you to even consider finishing that thing. You are to go back there tomorrow and disassemble it. I want that thing returned to its component parts and the component parts returned to Alexander stock, and the non-salvageable parts accounted for so that we can reimburse them.

I’ve had enthusiastic, bright minds working for me before – they’re the most dangerous thing on the planet. The next time you go to the Alexander plant, you will not go without a..responsible adult.”

“And speaking of responsible adults“ he said, turning in Al’s direction “WHY IN THE NAME OF ALL THE GODS IN THE PANTHEON DIDN’T YOU STOP HIM?”

“Who, me?”

“Who? What are you – an owl? He is young, brilliant and impressionable. He saw you skulking around doing you best James Bond imitation“ Al sniffed disgustedly “and he decided to build something that would help – until thankfully Billens caught the fact that firing that…thing would black out half of the Twin Cities. And YOU – who are supposed to guide our junior officers – LET HIM.”

Greg was sitting back trying his best not to laugh uncontrollably – correctly understanding that this would bring Neil’s ire down on him as well. Al sniffed again – obviously getting chewed out by a superior was not a matter of concern to him.

“Neil, you know as well as I do that the brightest man in this room is sitting here next to me. I saw him go for something, and thought it might be useful. By the time I realized what he was building it was too late to stop him easily. Anyway, I wanted to see where he was going with it. I’d have stopped him from FIRING it.”

“You’ve seen the classic officer evaluation – “His men would follow him anywhere – just to see what happened.” There was a lot of that – I wanted to see what would happen.”

Glytch was rather shocked. Yes, he’d had his toy taken away from him, but he’d just heard Al call him “The brightest man in the room” and Neil call him brilliant among other complimentary things. I guess the old guys like me, he thought bemusedly. While it mattered little, it did feel really good.

“OK. YOU obviously can’t be trusted to keep an eye on him, so it’s Billens’ job.” completely neglecting the fact that Billens had been there as well. “Billens, you take Young Tom Edison back to the plant tomorrow, clean up the mess, and break that thing down again. I will sincerely apologize to the R&D director there for his actions.”

With that done, the talk turned to other matters. Coffee, dessert and brandy for those who desired it was served, and one by one the people at the table drifted away.

[AmriloJim]

Thought of Glytchie as I pulled this label off an item acquired this afternoon at Harbor Freight...click on the image to see what warrants this warning.

hft.jpg (123.19 KiB) Viewed 8903 times

[/url]

[jwhouk]

Calvin obviously gave him a heads up.

[TazManiac]

Paraphrasing two things;

"As I peeled off the sticker..."


"Save These Warnings..."

[GlytchMeister]

Neil's decision to let Billens oversee me was a critical mistake...
Muahahahaha...
Played right into my hands!

[Dave]

Why am I hearing someone say "Push the button, Max!"?

[lake_wrangler]

Excellent writing, as always. However, a few nitpicks, about a slightly confusing passage:
(The following quotes are all following each other in the original text, and are separated here only so I can comment individually on them.)

Neil continued with his dinner briefing, which had become a regular feature of meals at Club Alexander With the pressure of time and schedules of training, work, activities and just plain life the only time most of them were together was at the evening meal – which had become the de-facto group meeting.

Here, we are establishing that Neil is about to speak. And yet...

“Neil and I are already up with this as is Glytch, but I’m not sure you know. We’ve identified the new strongman who’s taken over Tempelhoffer’s organization and is hammering down the rivals – and he’s a golem named Nodaki Bolethius.”

So either it was Neil speaking, and he should be naming someone else at the beginning of the sentence, or it's someone else, and it should be made clearer.

Al interrupted. “Golem? What’s a golem, mate? Only reference I have for the term is traditional Judaic writing of clay men activated by a scroll.” Al puzzled at this – they hadn’t annoyed anyone else, had they?

“You’re actually close – but they’re not Judaic they’re Lanthan.’ Neil knew that would be good for a rise – after the incidents Neil had heard of he knew Al was gun-shy of Lanthan anything – and especially their technology.

I believe the term is "Lanthian", not "Lanthan"... Of the nine posts in the forum which contain the incorrect term "lanthan", five of them belong to Al... as opposed to the 235 posts which refer to the Lanthians, a term which is corroborated both in-comic, and in the Wapsi Wiki...

“Lanthan? Oh, goddess – what kind of craziness are we dealing with now?” Neil continued, ignoring the amused looks from the far end of the table.

The statement makes it obvious that it's Al speaking, yet the continuation of the text makes it ambiguous... There should be a line break, before Neil continues, to separate and clarify the fact that the statement and the action that follows (i.e. Neil who continues speaking) are not from the same character.




Meanwhile...

Acacia gave Al a hug as mute acceptance for his apology, and returned to her place and continued eating.

That's just cute.

[jwhouk]

---

Calista exited the portal doorway into the visitation room at the Rochester Paranormal Rehabilitation Center. She'd enjoyed these visits to see Cavin a lot more now that he wasn't acting all psycho anymore.

The stuff that mom and dad's researchers had been able to do – with a little help from some paranormal-friendly researchers here at the Mayo Clinic – was nothing short of amazing. She'd love to tell Atsali and her other friends about it, but it was all hush-hush.

The only thing that mattered, of course, was that Cavin was back to normal. As normal as you could expect of a fae who'd been hit with about a dozen drug possession charges, along with evading arrest and a couple of attempted batteries when he was being subdued.

She waved at the officer who was monitoring the visiting area, and she was buzzed into the room. The place looked a lot like the lunch room at her high school, complete with vending machines, a microwave and a couple of flat-screen TV's.

She took a seat at one of the tables close to the Coke machine. Cavin had a thing for Coke Classic – though she'd at least convinced him to start drinking Coke Zero, to keep him from losing what teeth he had left. It wasn't long before he showed up, coming in from the inspection rooms.

"Heya, Cricket," he said as they exchanged hugs. "How's my favorite sister doin'?"

"I'm yer only sistah, Cave," she said with a chuckle. They had a seat. "What's new with ya?"

"What, you don't have any of mom's Fried Tarantula Sandwiches for me?"

"Nah," she said. "Didn't have time to stop at home aftah school. Figured you'd be able to spring for sumptin' here."

"Heh, I just sent in my canteen for the week," he chuckled. "But, I just might be able to convince 'em to release a few bucks for a soda or two."

She rolled her eyes. They played this little game every time she came to visit him after school. He got up and went over to the control booth and was given a payment card. The residents could use their own money to pay for things in the visiting area and canteen, but weren't allowed to use physical money or bills in either area.

He got them the usual – a small pan pizza that was easily heated up in the community pizza oven; a Coke Zero for him and a Dasani water for her.

"So, anything new I should be aware about?" she asked as they sat down to dive in to the food.

"Mmmh," he said, taking a forkful of the gooey mess. "Hearin' somethin' about a changin' of the guard with that gang I used ta hang with. Think it's cause of that one friend of your mentor."

"The Sage of the Forest?" she asked after downing a swig of her water. "I'd heard there was sum sorta bounty thing goin' on, thanks ta your buddy's dad."

"Yeah, but it's gotten weirder. Seems some guy outta Mexico's made his way up ta the Twin Cities. Taken over most of the drug dealers. That list Monica told ya about? It's pretty much down to six names."

"So what's weird about that?" she replied. "Still got prices on the heads of M and a lot of her friends."

"Nah, that's not it," he told her. "There's this weird stipulation – this guy wants two of 'em alive."

"Alive?" This surprised Calista, because Monica had told her that all the bounties were contingent on kills. "Who's he want alive?"

"The Timekeeper," he said, taking a bite of the crust of his slice of pizza. "And her daughter."

Calista's eyebrows – and antenna stalks – shot straight up. She knew what those two meant to Monica.

"Why's he want 'em alive? He knows he can't kill 'em?"

"Partially." Cavin took a swig of his Coke Zero bottle. "From what I've heard of some of the others in here…" He leaned in, conspiratorially. "…He's a golem."

"What?" Calista's eyes were wide as Cavin took another swig of his drink. "I thought there were only da three girls, and da Timekeeper herself?"

"'Parrently sumone back in the day tried to duplicate the mixture. 'Bout the time da World Grid was set up. Dis guy who was a big shot soldier for the Etheitians…"

"The Anasazi crystal people that Atsali dealt with?" Cavin nodded.

"…They used da recipe to make him. 'Cept that the process got interrupted by the Kikai 'Splosion. He came out in one piece, but he wasn't 'done' when they threw him in stasis."

"How the hell you know 'bout this?" Calista asked her brother.

"Same people who got me the info that pointed Miss Bud in the direction of Tempelhoffer," he smiled wickedly. "This guy apparently talks in his sleep or sumptin'. Think it's part of his problem."

"Geez, Cave – if this is true, I gotta let Miss Villarreal know," she said, overcoming her shock.

"I know. That's why I'm tellin' ya. And it's not just 'cause your mentor is still wanted, neither."

"She's still got a bounty on her?"

"Yeah. 'Cept it's now in five figures."

[Sgt. Howard]

May poited in towards the end of dessert- "Sorry I'm late," she offered, "Had to find my writings in the library, and there was some kerfuffle about if I had authority. There's an old Goat there I would love to... well, never mind. I don't remember all my details on the subject, but my notes are pretty complete and I did a hardcopy for our perusal- Neil, you're dealing with a real asshole here- Nodaki Bolethius was the chief priest who instigated the golem program. He wanted to build an army of these things- absolutely obedient to him and no other. He even insisted that he himself be 'immortalized' by the process... I took great pains to make sure a critical part of the process was missing on him,"
"Wait a minute... " Neil interrupted, "You GOLEMIZED this jackass?!? What were you thinking?"
May looked at Neil scornfully-
"OH!- And YOU'VE never done the wrong thing under duress?"

Neil felt a cold slap in that voice- blushing furiously, he shut up.

"Anyway... he's been released from a stasis tube recently... that's the only explanation for him still being alive... he's falling apart inside. At best, he has five years, probably less. He'll be looking for me and Jin. He'll want the process finished,"
Al spoke up- "What... if I dare ask... is the process we are speaking of? I have only just been made aware of such things and have no clue how this is done,"
"That you know nothing of the process is as it should be," May replied, "There is no need to create golems. We are a aberration of man's perversion of nature... and not that we wish to be," Brandi and Bud looked down at these words, "but here we are,"
"Excuse me?" Al replied, "YOU are a golem as well?"
"Yes... Nodaki insisted that I become immortal so that I might do maintenance on him through the ages... I assure you, I did not volunteer for the job... "
"I see... and... CAN you do what he requires? CAN you complete the process?"

May took a deep breath and gave a massive sigh,
"I'm not sure,"

[Sgt. Howard]

"It would seem," Daisy volunteered, "That we need only outlive this fellow and that is the end of the problem... or am I missing something?"
"This man is as ruthless as humanity has ever produced- he knows his time is limited, he will do anything to be immortal... and powerful,"
"It ain't all it's cracked up to be," snarked Phix, Dixie contentedly at her breast.
"He'll do what he thinks will make it happen- anybody who gets in his way dies. That he's re-vamping Templehoffer's fiefdom means that a LOT of heavyweights are going to die... but by the time he's done, he WILL have an organization we have to worry about.
And let us not forget- he IS a powerful wizard in his own right,"

[DinkyInky]

Safyr was bored, and despite everything she had done, including nap, her sister had still not returned.
While she wasn't told to do more spying, she hadn't been told not to either.

Calling her steed, she raced lazily to the portal, dispelled her, and went in, found her exit, and cloaking herself in a mask, entered into the bar. If anyone looked, all they'd see was an attractive, short, curvy human redhead with intense blue eyes.

Buying drinks here and there and flirting got her the usual attention, so she had a cover, she then listened in for keywords.
After a couple of hours dodging drunken advances, it began to pay off, and she was rewarded with gossip and riffraff bravado. When she heard them, she politely made excuses, claiming she hit her limit, had to work in the morning, etcetera, and left.
Turning a corner, she removed the mask, whispered two incantations, and vanished, running fast, faster, until she hit the portal still at a run. This called for speed.
Sprinting to the second, she ran through chanting, and leapt on her steed, racing for the manor, stopping at the entrance. Gathering shadows(she had a reputation after all), she entered, stopping on the end of the dinner table Neil was at, and reappeared.

"Sire, I have urgent news," whispering in his ear.

"There is word that the man of clay plans an attack on an individual known to you. They call him, 'the Indian mechanic'. While I have no doubt my sister and I could handle it, we do not wish innocents caught in the middle. I await your orders."

[FreeFlier]

. . . "A crazy nerd."

aka a Spark.

--FreeFlier

[lake_wrangler]

. . . "A crazy nerd."

aka a Spark.

--FreeFlier

Indeed. I'm surprised they were able to interrupt him in his work, while he was in the crazy place, without any repercussions...

[TazManiac]

Stan was awake early Monday morning, which was unusual for him, due to his normally Night-Owl type internal clock.

He didn't have Class on Mondays and this was a good time to get started on some things, before the rest of the household got up and started moving about the place.

Tina had stayed in bed the whole night this time; she had taken to 'leaving a pilot-light on' so to speak when he was sleeping nearby; they had had the beginning of some discussions about 'Sleep' in general, and her situation regarding it, but it was something she was still working out and didn't really want to talk about.

Suffice to say, on most nights they where together she'd have at least one of her Internal Committee man the helm, in case any middle-of-the-night interaction were required.

In this case he tried not to disturb her as he got dressed and wrote her a note which he left on the nightstand. He'd meant to mention his plans for this morning and the rest of the day before bed last night, but Tina had distracted him with something she'd heard about and wanted to try out. On him. So she did.

Tucking her in, and with a smile on his face, still, he made his way downstairs and then outside into the predawn darkness...