Schtupid Email Scams

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TazManiac
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Re: Schtupid Email Scams

Post by TazManiac » Sun Oct 22, 2017 10:48 pm

OK, here are a few tasty bits from a local web site named 'Redneck, Ooops, sorry READHEADED Blackbelt':

Short Story Sunday: A Slam Dunk <--Meth-head related...

The Trimmers Lament 'Tr-Immigrants' are traveling bands, sometimes couples and singles, often from very far away lands, who travel to whats known as 'the Emerald Triangle' in hopes of trimming the big and medium leaves off the choice fat buds, prior to sending them off to market... This link is for all you flik-folk out there.
(edit- it's sung to the song 'Streets of Laredo' ; )

And here's one for our favorite Cabbie: Suspect Called a Cab to Escape...

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lake_wrangler
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Re: Schtupid Email Scams

Post by lake_wrangler » Sun Nov 05, 2017 11:19 pm

Oh wow! I feel so privileged!

Apparently, I have "CONSIGNMENT BOXES PURSUIT IN BENIN GHANA TOGO NIGERIA SPAIN FRANCE MALAYSIA INDONESIA CHINA AND KOREA ." Or so says "JANET NAPOLITANO, THE SECRETARY OF U.S DEPARTMENT OF HOMELAND SECURITY OF AMERICA, AM IN CHARGE TO MONITORED ALL FOREIGN TRANSACTIONS IN AFRICA EUROPE AND ASIA." (It would seem that her computer's keyboard is stuck on CAPS LOCK...) And apparently, one of these boxes, the one in Benin, I think, contains " UNITED STATES DOLLAR BILLS WORTH OVER US$10,725,000 MILLION DOLLARS". And I can get it, for only a small fee of $47...

Not only that, but only two days later, I received an email from " Barrister Phil Wilson (ATTORNEY IN FACT)" His " client by Name Mr. Barry a national of your country and share the same last name of you "... Well, if he shares the last name "of me", why then address the email as Dear Sir? Do you not know my last name? According to him, Mr Barry "of my last name" is an oil consultant who died in a car accident with all his family, and this attorney says that he left "$12,500,000.00 floating in his suspense account and all the effort I made to locate any member of his family through your Embassy here proved abortive." Funny, though, I don't know of any Barry "of my last name", in any branch of the family...

At least, this guy is not asking for money up front, only bank information, to be able to deposit the money... And I get to keep 45% of it! What a deal!



I wonder how many people will fall for such outrageous claims... :roll:

:lol: :lol: :lol:

Oh, and look: another consignment box I was told about, this one last month... and it contains 2.9 million dollars... All they need is my info, as the diplomatic agent in charge of the box seems to have misplaced my address... so would i be so kind as to give them:

Your Full Name:
Your Country:
Your Direct Telephone Numbers:
Your Nearest airport:
Your Current Home Address:
Your E-mail Address:
Your Current Occupation:
Your age:

funny, I thought they already had my name and email address... I guess not... Or, at least, they won't know which email address from their purchased list was mine, until I reply to them...

Funny, how I manage to put stuff on consignment which I never had in the first place...

ShneekeyTheLost
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Re: Schtupid Email Scams

Post by ShneekeyTheLost » Mon Nov 06, 2017 1:30 am

That's okay, they're in the job hunting market too.

I got an unsolicited job offer (which is, by its very nature, suspicious) to work for a charitable organization. Apparently, my job is to accept donations from foreign nationals by wire into my account and forward it on to another account, and I would receive some percentage of the donations as my fee.

This actually came to me through Monster.com which I had registered on to go job hunting some years ago, and they had a bogus website which, at first blush, looked almost believable. The grammar was not atrocious. Gee, if only I didn't... yanno... work in the financial industry and know exactly what sort of money-laundering scam they were pulling. I reported it to Monster.com, filing a complaint about it, and forwarded the information to the FBI. It's almost certainly linked to a dummy account, but if there's a rash of these sorts of things going around, they need to know about it so they can tell the suckers what not to fall for next.

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Dave
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Re: Schtupid Email Scams

Post by Dave » Mon Nov 06, 2017 1:49 am

Oh, they can be very inventive indeed! Sometimes rather far-fetched, but inventive.

A few months back I got a come-on from somebody who claimed to have used nefarious means to get his hands on a famous Japanese restaurant's proprietary recipe for a meat-dipping sauce they're famous for. He wanted an investment of seed money so he could buy the vinegar, spices, and citrus to reproduce it exactly, and promised a 200% return on investment once he started shipping it in quantity to the U.S. and Europe.

I could tell it was just a ponzu scheme, of course.

Warrl
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Re: Schtupid Email Scams

Post by Warrl » Mon Nov 06, 2017 12:22 pm

Dave, after that one I think you should be putting something in a jar...

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Hansontoons
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Re: Schtupid Email Scams

Post by Hansontoons » Mon Nov 06, 2017 1:23 pm

Warrl wrote:Dave, after that one I think you should be putting something in a jar...
How about a complete set of Ginsu Steak Knives, or an unopened vintage bottle of Hai Karate, or maybe a case of ramen noodles...

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Dave
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Re: Schtupid Email Scams

Post by Dave » Mon Nov 06, 2017 1:32 pm

(Dave places an 1970's-vintage Ronco Pocket Fisherman into the Pun Jar, in honor of all of the now-poor marks who have fallen for these scams... hook, line, and sinker).

Hai Karate? Really? Ugh. One slight benefit to having been born with a whole bunch of allergies is that I've never been tempted to slather myself with such stuff.

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AmriloJim
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Re: Schtupid Email Scams

Post by AmriloJim » Mon Nov 06, 2017 3:08 pm

From today's mailbag:
How to restore your PayPal account
Hello Client,
To get back into your PayPal account, you'll need to update your account.
It's easy:
Click the link below to open a secure browser window.
Confirm that you're the owner of the account, and then follow the instructions.
Then they add...
If you are not a PayPal client, Register now. to enjoy all PayPal features.
If I'm not a Paypal client, then why would I need to restore my account?

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Hansontoons
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Re: Schtupid Email Scams

Post by Hansontoons » Mon Nov 06, 2017 3:52 pm

Dave wrote:(Dave places an 1970's-vintage Ronco Pocket Fisherman into the Pun Jar, in honor of all of the now-poor marks who have fallen for these scams... hook, line, and sinker).

Hai Karate? Really? Ugh. One slight benefit to having been born with a whole bunch of allergies is that I've never been tempted to slather myself with such stuff.
I remember it as the Popeil Pocket Fisherman!

Well, Hai Karate is Japanese, right?

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AmriloJim
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Re: Schtupid Email Scams

Post by AmriloJim » Mon Nov 06, 2017 4:11 pm

Popeil and Ronco were both Ron Popeil enterprises, so potato, potato.

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Dave
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Re: Schtupid Email Scams

Post by Dave » Mon Nov 06, 2017 4:47 pm

Hansontoons wrote:Well, Hai Karate is Japanese, right?
Not as far as I can tell... seems to be as American as apple pie. It was introduced by Pfizer (their Leeming division, which was originally the Leeming Pharmaceutical Company, which seems to have started out as the Thomas Leeming & Sons Company) and marketed in the US and UK.

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Hansontoons
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Re: Schtupid Email Scams

Post by Hansontoons » Mon Nov 06, 2017 7:07 pm

Dave wrote:
Hansontoons wrote:Well, Hai Karate is Japanese, right?
Not as far as I can tell... seems to be as American as apple pie. It was introduced by Pfizer (their Leeming division, which was originally the Leeming Pharmaceutical Company, which seems to have started out as the Thomas Leeming & Sons Company) and marketed in the US and UK.
I should have added a wink/smile to the post...

Hai Karate was silly even back when available.

And Popeil/Ronco, same thing. Wink and a smile.

;)

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Atomic
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Re: Schtupid Email Scams

Post by Atomic » Tue Nov 07, 2017 12:31 am

Hansontoons wrote:... an unopened vintage bottle of Hai Karate, ...
How well I remember a grass green bamboo shaped plastic spray bottle of said vintage odoriferous conflagration! I was the bane of my Junior High dance. Or maybe not, because at least I got one slow (close -- very close) dance with a certain young lady.... ummm, I'll stop there.

Hey, we were all young and dumb once. Sometimes in gropes! Sorry -- groups. Never mind.
Don't let other peoples limitations become your constraints!

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Alkarii
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Re: Schtupid Email Scams

Post by Alkarii » Thu Dec 14, 2017 3:57 am

Not a big one, but I just deleted an email with a subject line that was half asterisks, and said my Walgreen's order had arrived.

Oddly enough, I have NEVER ordered anything online from Walgreen's, and I don't think I've ever bought anything in person from one of their stores, either.
There is no such thing as a science experiment gone wrong.

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TazManiac
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Re: Schtupid Email Scams

Post by TazManiac » Sun Dec 31, 2017 7:15 pm

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/the ... iddle-man/

More trouble for the ‘Nigerian prince’: Louisiana police say they caught scam’s middle man.

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Atomic
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Re: Schtupid Email Scams

Post by Atomic » Mon Jan 01, 2018 9:22 am

TazManiac wrote:https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/the ... iddle-man/

More trouble for the ‘Nigerian prince’: Louisiana police say they caught scam’s middle man.
It seems he as some pull, and might get out of it with a demotion to Viscount or Duke.
Don't let other peoples limitations become your constraints!

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lake_wrangler
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Re: Schtupid Email Scams

Post by lake_wrangler » Sun Apr 01, 2018 10:12 pm

Hey, just got a new one, recently (only saw it today...)
Attention ,

UNITED NATIONS / WORLD BANK COMPENSATION UNIT. Our Ref: U.N/WBO/042SWISS/2010.
Attention: My good friend, How are you today? Hope all is well with you
and family?,
Do I know you?
You may not understand why this mail came to you. We have
been having a meeting for the past 7 months which just ended Few days ago with the secretary to the UNITED NATIONS.
Wow! a 7 month meeting? Did they eat or sleep at all, during that time? And how did the UN's secretary conduct the rest of his business, during that time? Then again, why am I trying to inject logic into the argument of a spam letter...
This email is to all the people that have been scammed in any part of the world, the UNITED NATIONS In Affiliation with WORLD BANK have agreed to compensate them with USD 850,000,00
Since when does the UN care about that kind of stuff? I thought they were too busy trying to shove their agenda down people's throats (don't get me started...)
This includes every foreign contractors that may have not received their
contract sum, and people that have had an unfinished transaction or
international businesses that failed due to Government problems etc. We
found your name in the list of those who are to benefit from these
compensation exercise and that is why we are contacting you,
Funny, I don't recall getting scammed in the past, or doing business internationally... Not much call for driving busses remotely, you know...
this have been agreed upon and have been signed. You are advised to contact Rev Abraham.M. Morris of our paying center in Johannesburg, South Africa,as he is our representative in South Africa, contact him immediately for your Cheque/ International Bank Draft
of USD$850,000.00
Well,now. He's a Reverend. I'M sure this must all be legit, then.
This funds are in a Bank Draft for security purpose OK?, so he will send
it to you and you can clear it in any bank of your choice.
Who am I to argue, right?
Therefore, you should send him your full Name and telephone number your correct mailing address where you want him to send the Draft to you. Contact Rev Abraham.M. Morris immediately for your Cheque at the given address below:
Sure, will do! Oh wait: I don't think I can afford the postage.
You can view the link so that you can know more about the compensation
http://www.un.org/News/Press/docs/2003/ik344.doc.htm
I'll go there right away. (I'm not worried about a virus download on my LInux system...)
Well, it redirects to another site, with a different URL... the URL does contain "UN" in it, but is not the URL of the United Nations website. So even though they have the right color scheme, and the logo, maybe they're not as legit as they want me to believe? I wonder what some less distrustful people might think, upon reaching that site...
Person to Contact Sir.Rev Abraham.M. Morris
Email: mrabraham.mmorris@webmail.co.za
OH good! So I don't need to pay for postage, to contact this guy... :P
I apologize on behalf of my organization for any delay you have might
encountered in receiving your fund in the past.
I know, right? The delay between the time I was never scammed and now was just SOOOOOO long... :roll:
Thanks and God bless you
and your family. Hoping to hear from you as soon as you cash your Bank
Draft. Making the world a better place.
Regards,
Under Secretary-General
Mary Jones
If you say so...

I don't know. It feels like the email scam is breaking the fourth wall, or something... Anyway, I had fun reading it... :lol:

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lake_wrangler
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Re: Schtupid Email Scams

Post by lake_wrangler » Sun Apr 01, 2018 10:18 pm

Hey look: someone else says they "owe" me money...

Be informed that we have verified your payment file as directed to us and your name is next on the list of our outstanding fund beneficiaries to receive their payment. Be advised that because of too many funds beneficiaries, you are entitled to receive the sum of $14.5M,(Fourteen Million Five Hundred Thousand Dollars only), as to enable us pay other eligible beneficiaries.

To facilitate with the process of this transaction, please kindly re-confirm the following information below:


1) Your Full Name:
2) Your Full Address:
3) Your Contact Telephone and Fax No:
4) Your Profession, Age and Marital Status:
5) Any Valid Form of Your Identification/Driver's License:
6) Bank Name:
7) Bank Address:
8) Account Name:
9) Account Number:
10) Swift Code:
11) Routing Number:
Sure! I always give this kind of information to total strangers... especially those who claim they owe me money for past dealings I never had with them... :lol:

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TazManiac
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Re: Schtupid Email Scams

Post by TazManiac » Sun Apr 01, 2018 11:58 pm

Heh1, I just was updating my 'Monster.Com' online resume and started getting al kinds of email and a few phone calls, one of which wanted me to give them the last four digits of my Social Security. Off of a cold call. to an otherwise total stranger. No 'Tanks.

Hold one, I have one in my SPAM folder I haven't deleted yet...


(Title): Possible Pedophile in Your Area

(Main text in body of email): "Sex Offender List – Kids Live Safe" <Sex.Offender.List..Kids.Live.Safe@formeditiencehidensedpo______etiment.com> <--- link munged on purpose...

What doesn't come across w/ a simple copy/paste is the embedded button and picture of text instructing me to 'Click to Report Spam' and 'Click Show Images to see your Message' .

I am NOT clicking that link.

I don't need some email to hunt down pedophiles, if I need to find them out I will undertake that myself. This is some kind of reverse-FUD button pushing motivated to Get Than Link Clicked, Right Now! Aint doo'n it.

Ah, for the simpler days when I was pen-pals with Nigerian Royalty. <sigh> Life was so easier then...

Alkarii
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Re: Schtupid Email Scams

Post by Alkarii » Mon Apr 02, 2018 12:17 am

I guess the existence of the sex offender registry isn't quite common knowledge yet?
There is no such thing as a science experiment gone wrong.

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