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Re: Trespass Comments Section

Posted: Fri Sep 22, 2017 6:29 pm
by Dave
Just Old Al wrote:Was thinking about the poor trees in that area. They had little insulation against what happened to them, sentient or not.

You might say is was a low-R Ent district.
(Dave makes an appreciative wince)

Trees. Insulation. Hmmm.

Now, if they'd had kapok trees growing there, things might have been better. The silk from kapok seed pods makes good insulation... it's all warm and fluffy. (Dave hums an upbeat few bars of "High-R 'n high-R")

On the other hand, there's a legend that Bazil, the demon of death, is imprisoned in a large kapok tree, having been tricked into entering there by a carpenter. So, maybe having kapok trees would have made things not-better.
chicgeek wrote:A magic wand is produced, and waved theatrically. "Balla bim, balla boo!" A puff of smoke has him wheezing, but all that happens is his waistcoat gaining polka dots. "Oh, bother!"
Ya'know, I would definitely buy a cel from a Disney production of that part of the story, as long as it showed smoke and Al wearing a polka-dotted weskit. :lol:
chicgeek wrote:Do I have to go on, Al? This can get sooo much worse. *evil grin*
Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaassssssssseeeeeeeeeee???

Re: Trespass Comments Section

Posted: Fri Sep 22, 2017 7:07 pm
by Just Old Al
Dave wrote:
chicgeek wrote:Do I have to go on, Al? This can get sooo much worse. *evil grin*
Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaassssssssseeeeeeeeeee???
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! :)

Re: Trespass Comments Section

Posted: Fri Sep 22, 2017 7:59 pm
by GlytchMeister
Just Old Al wrote:
Dave wrote:
chicgeek wrote:Do I have to go on, Al? This can get sooo much worse. *evil grin*
Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaassssssssseeeeeeeeeee???
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! :)
Nooo... No no nooo... No no no NO NO NO NONONONONO FUUUUUUUUUUUU

Re: Trespass Comments Section

Posted: Fri Sep 22, 2017 8:24 pm
by TazManiac
Reaching to his side and unbuckling the belt, John examined the sword, drawing it a few inches from the scabbard to peek at the blade. Reaching to his side and unbuckling the belt, John examined the sword, drawing it a few inches from the scabbard to peek at the blade.
I haven't yet checked if it's already been mention, but I came across a duplicate line in the text...

Re: Trespass Comments Section

Posted: Sat Sep 23, 2017 3:57 pm
by Just Old Al
TazManiac wrote:
Reaching to his side and unbuckling the belt, John examined the sword, drawing it a few inches from the scabbard to peek at the blade. Reaching to his side and unbuckling the belt, John examined the sword, drawing it a few inches from the scabbard to peek at the blade.
I haven't yet checked if it's already been mention, but I came across a duplicate line in the text...
Thanks for mentioning it - my bad. Much appreciated. I glued this together out of 42 pages of post (820 posts) of mostly-drivel. :)

Re: Trespass Comments Section

Posted: Sat Sep 23, 2017 7:02 pm
by DinkyInky
GlytchMeister wrote:
Just Old Al wrote:
Dave wrote:Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaassssssssseeeeeeeeeee???
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! :)
Nooo... No no nooo... No no no NO NO NO NONONONONO FUUUUUUUUUUUU
While everyone else says nope...
...she's saying maybe? :twisted:
Call me a Smurf with a toothpick will you?

Re: Trespass Comments Section

Posted: Sat Sep 23, 2017 7:09 pm
by Just Old Al
DinkyInky wrote: Call me a Smurf with a toothpick will you?
Maaaaaaage...Do NOT stir up the Smurf! I warn you, the consequences will be dire.

Re: Trespass Comments Section

Posted: Sun Sep 24, 2017 12:03 am
by TazManiac
- I've been able to read this 'Trespass' story but not always on a device that I've been able to log in to allow commenting.

- I've some thought's I mean to recreate, that came to me during the first pass though, I think I can get the gist of them during a second reading. (So don't hold yer breath, but I think I'll have a more pithy follow-up to come...)

- In a nutshell, and at this moment I like the pacing, the exposition was a fine balance that worked to help 'spian but didn't bog the story down, & any corrections I might contribute would be nit-picky & purely fine-tuning in nature.

On the whole; Well Done, all who hand a hand in.

Two things to end with:

1) Glytch; (comments on asking for feedback. Can't quite word my response the way I want at this time, not negative, just responsive communication...)

2) I like this story.

Re: Trespass Comments Section

Posted: Sun Sep 24, 2017 3:11 am
by chicgeek
Dave said,

Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaassssssssseeeeeeeeeee???

Heh. Heh. Heh. We'll see.

Re: Trespass Comments Section

Posted: Sun Sep 24, 2017 10:28 am
by ShneekeyTheLost
You know not what of what you request. There are some things, terrible things, which were lost, to the betterment of humanity. Do not exhume that which should rightfully die, lest you experience something so eldritch, so alien, that your mind breaks attempting to make sense of something which fundamentally is antithesis to rationality.

Leave slumbering elder beings lie.

Re: Trespass Comments Section

Posted: Sun Sep 24, 2017 6:20 pm
by Sgt. Howard
ShneekeyTheLost wrote:You know not what of what you request. There are some things, terrible things, which were lost, to the betterment of humanity. Do not exhume that which should rightfully die, lest you experience something so eldritch, so alien, that your mind breaks attempting to make sense of something which fundamentally is antithesis to rationality.

Leave slumbering elder beings lie.

... like my recipe for roadkill reptile? Or maybe the deleted scene where we infect the wendigo with toenail fungus? Originally, I nail it right between the eyes while urinating... but we decided that was a bit much... or there was that (WHAP!!! WHAPWHAPWHAP!! "Oh, you did NOT just go there you decrepit NCO!!!" WHAP!!! "GAH!!! NAH GIBT ES...? Ialin?!? Wah??? I am NOT YOUR MORTAL, you steroid-bound mayfly!!! Git!!!" WHAPWHAPWHAP!!!! "You keep your smarmy, big-tale-telling yapp shut, you hear me?!? I will NOT have you inflict your sick perversions on these people!!! AND I HAVE HARDER THINGS TO HIT YOU WITH, CAPICE?!?")

... um... yea... (ouch!) ... let slumbering elder beings lie... (Stupid dryad...)

Re: Trespass Comments Section

Posted: Sun Sep 24, 2017 7:45 pm
by Dave
Oh, I don't know. I've always enjoyed seeing what can be found under dark, damp rocks when you turn them over. Call me a rubble-rouser if you will...

Re: Trespass Comments Section

Posted: Sun Sep 24, 2017 8:08 pm
by Just Old Al
Sgt. Howard wrote: ... um... yea... (ouch!) ... let slumbering elder beings lie... (Stupid dryad...)
I just hyperventilated you sick son-of-a-centaur. OMG.

HIT HIM AGAIN!

Re: Trespass Comments Section

Posted: Sun Sep 24, 2017 8:09 pm
by Just Old Al
Dave wrote:Oh, I don't know. I've always enjoyed seeing what can be found under dark, damp rocks when you turn them over. Call me a rubble-rouser if you will...
Well, I guess there's more than one way to get stoned....

Re: Trespass Comments Section

Posted: Sun Sep 24, 2017 10:14 pm
by DinkyInky
Just Old Al wrote:
Sgt. Howard wrote: ... um... yea... (ouch!) ... let slumbering elder beings lie... (Stupid dryad...)
I just hyperventilated you sick son-of-a-centaur. OMG.

HIT HIM AGAIN!
Ialin wrote:Gladly. What do you think,
Shillelagh or besom bundle?

Re: Trespass Comments Section

Posted: Mon Sep 25, 2017 4:04 am
by Just Old Al
Just Old Al wrote: HIT HIM AGAIN!
Ialin wrote:Gladly. What do you think,
Shillelagh or besom bundle?
Oh, let's go with the favorites. The shillelagh, of course. Ought to raise a few nice welts.

Re: Trespass Comments Section

Posted: Mon Sep 25, 2017 10:31 am
by Sgt. Howard
I will show the more... intimate... images of Ialin with her ... toys... unless you stand down.

Re: Trespass Comments Section

Posted: Mon Sep 25, 2017 10:41 am
by GlytchMeister
Sgt. Howard wrote:I will show the more... intimate... images of Ialin with her ... toys... unless you stand down.
(Seven-foot-tall muscular martial arts student, former vigilante, current assassin, and Salamander walks in and leans against the wall, followed shortly by a much shorter and leaner hacker, archer, and mad omnidicsiplinarian engineer and scientist)
*AHEM*

"I don't care if it's Gabs you're showing intimate pictures of. You do that to a woman, you'll disappear."

"And I'll make you disappear from all Government and civil records."

Re: Trespass Comments Section

Posted: Mon Sep 25, 2017 11:44 am
by Just Old Al
Sgt. Howard wrote:I will show the more... intimate... images of Ialin with her ... toys... unless you stand down.
{Al mode on}

"You really might want to reconsider those actions...with the proper preparations I can have your amphibian behind swimming in the pond and eating flies at Alexander in no time. Annie can come and visit you and try and kiss the spell away...but I can prevent that."

{/Al}

Re: Trespass Comments Section

Posted: Tue Sep 26, 2017 1:22 pm
by DinkyInky
Sgt. Howard wrote:I will show the more... intimate... images of Ialin with her ... toys... unless you stand down.
Ialin wrote:So what you are saying is that you want me to wear my full plate battle armour and beat you senseless with various weaponry...er, "toys". And yes, I know intimately how to maximise damage with them.

That can easily be arranged. I might even ask the mage to photograph it for your memoirs.
Safyr wrote:I might lend my assistance if you ask nicely,
and there really is no way to misinterpret what I mean when I call something a toy. :twisted: