Paintball madness

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Just Old Al
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Paintball madness

Post by Just Old Al » Fri Sep 16, 2016 4:29 pm

Buck stood at the head of the group, wearing a striped vest over his centaur chest, his mask pushed to his forehead. With him was Justin, also attired in a referee's vest along with his mask. Buck spoke, his voice carrying easily over the mixed crowd.

"All right - everyone knows the rules.

I am going to assume all of you chronyed your markers - and if you didn't say so and I'll allow you the time. These things can be dangerous if they're ramped up, so better safe than sorry. Also, if you're not using the HydroTec paintballs empty your reservoirs and load up with these. We've got folks here sensitive to inorganic items, so better safe than sorry.

Now, to remind everyone:

Yes, you can go feral. Yes, you can use any abilities you have.

NO, physical contact is not allowed. I'm serious about this - no roughhousing. These are mixed teams with squishies, bevies and preds - you are NOT allowed to play rough.

NO, you cannot deflect paintballs and magic to deflect them is not allowed. Take your lumps and suck it up - this means YOU, Sterling. Spreaking of magic - Eme, Safyr, no shadow-walking - that's just not fair to the other participants. You have plenty of abilities to fall back on."

The crowd snickered and Sterling, completely unfazed by the accusation stood with her marker, mask pushed to forehead as they all were. Safyr and Emerauld, arrayed in safety gear of their own devising, looked disgruntled - as if anyone would accuse them of taking unfair advantage!

Eme leaned to Safyr and whispered "Uss orn'la henotep talinth nindel nind xuat khaless udossa ulu jivvin nind xonathull nibele xuileb boron." (One would almost think
that they don't trust us to play ther battle game without advantage.)

Safyr replied, "Usstan tlun naut ghil ulu noa, d'anthe dalninil - lu'dos orn satiir l'jusron d'l' "paintballs" dal ussta rah!"(I am not here to lose, dear sister - and you will feel the wrath of the 'paintballs' from my hand!)

Eme snickered. "Ji nindel zhah l'i'dol nindol zhah ulu tlu, d'anthe dalninil! Udos orn thalra pholor l'xonathull berrkig, t'yin!" (So that is the way this is to be, dear sister! We will meet on the battle field, then!) With that, both turned forward, as the briefing continued.

"So this is capture the flag. Bronze Green team - your flag is to the far side to the right. Limestone team, yours is down and to the right as you know."

Nadette nudged 'Sali and whispered for her ears only. "What's with the colors - we can't just do red and blue like everybody else?"

'Sali whispered back, "Grandpa chose them - they're Land-Rover badge colors."

Nadette snickered. "Figures."

"So, this is a fifteen-minute round. Name of the game is capture the flag - and return it to your base to win. There's a circle around your base - and the flag needs to be inside that to win.

Any questions?"

The two teams stood side by side - no one was taking this seriously, though they were all definitely out to win.

For strengths and weaknesses the teams were nearly equally matched - each side had its share of the available talent pool The Limestone team had Rowdy and Cinnamon, already in feral with paintball rifles sculpted to their forms by RE. Daisy was on the Bronze Green team, grinning madly and looking forward to the contest as well as scoring a few hits on her offspring (too old to play, indeed!).

Limestone also had two flyers - Shelley and Atsali - while Bronze Green had one - Phix. Of seasoned warriors - cautioned not to take things too seriously - there also was a distribution, with Limestone getting Al while Bronze Green got Neil and Greg. The elves were equally divided - Safyr playing for Limestone, and Eme of course choosing Bronze Green. The rest - squishies, immortals, and beings of various types - were arrayed equally as well - each team having its strengths and weaknesses.

"All right - everyone to your flags. The game starts in three minutes. POSITIONS!"

The teams scattered, each to their base. The seconds ticked by,and Buck counted down "3...2...1!" and blew the whistle.

Pandemonium reigned. Phix and Shelley immediately took to the air, scouting the movements of the other team, dodging and feinting against the fire already rising from the ground. Cindy and Rowdy galloped out to each side, each trying to circle in on the flag at the other team's base.

Others spread out, each working in their position to either attack or defend.

Al, completely leisurely, walked 50 feet from the flag base at the beginning, selected a tree, and with the grace of a younger man proceeded to climb it and ensconce himself happily in its branches just above eye level. With this vantage point no one was getting anywhere near that flag - or so he reasoned.

However, Sarge had other ideas. Knowing his blood brother's proclivity for devious behaviour, he and Neil had decided to take him out of play as early as possible. Working their way in flanking mode toward the enemy base each strained his senses to pick up a trace of the other warrior.

Suddenly, there was a THWIP, THWIP sound and Neil dove for cover.

"GREG, HE'S OVER HERE!" Greg, alerted, ran for the other side, dodging other players in his headlong rush.

Neil stuck his head up, scanning for the sniper who'd nearly taken him out of the game. With Sarge charging into the area, he was hoping to spot Al trying to take Greg out of play.

In the branches of a tree to the left he saw a disturbance - had there been any wind he'd have missed it.

There you are....perching in a tree, eh? Well, there's ONE way to Phix that!
he mentally chuckled.

Backing out, he stood and waved his arms overhead. Phix swooped closer and Neil yelled "Tree - hit it!" indicating the source of the difficulty.

"ON IT!" she yelled back, swooping down toward the offending tree.

THWIP, THWIP, THWIP sang in the air around her as she jinked. Reaching to her bag, she pulled out a paint grenade, activated it, and flung it for the tree. It sailed into the greenery, and seconds later she was rewarded with an "OH, BUGGER".

Neil and Greg stood, and walked under the tree. Ensconced ten feet up was a thoroughly disgruntled Brit, smeared in the paint from the grenades. Greg looked up, and laconically raised his marker and shot Al in the arse. "Just for the record - tag."

The look on Al's face, as visible under the full mask, was priceless. He climbed down, muttering imprecations all the way, until he stood on the ground. As Neil and Greg laughed at him, the tree shuddered convulsively, as though battered by a high wind. A rain of paint showered down upon the two as-yet-unmarked men, thoroughly removing them from the game with friendly fire.

"Just for the record - the mark's bigger than a quarter...yer out, mate..." Al then guffawed, and slapped the hapless pair on their shoulders. "Let's retire from the field, shall we?"

All around the field, pitched engagements took place. Sterling, holding to her promise not to use deflection magic, took full advantage of her Sight and knelt in the cover of a thicket. Like the trained marksman she was she went about methodically eliminating assailants on Limestone's goal, knowing how they'd move even before they did. The elves, using slings with the organic paintballs, flitted about for their respective sides, each trying to eliminate the other but also taking target of opportunity on any one foolish enough to cross their paths. Evenly matched as they werew, the contest between them degenerated to a draw - each too good to be hit by the other yet unable to score a decisive blow.

The Limestone Team had not been idle all of this time, however. While their defenders had been bearing the brunt of the Bronze Green team's affections, the centaurs had by dint of speed managed to sneak in and bear off Bronze's flag.

Cindy, carrying the flag, picked he way back out through the trees to the open space and tried to run. With the shouts of the defenders, though, it wasn't long before she caught several paintballs, at least two of them from her mother. Rowdy swept in, took the flag from a cursing Cindy, and started again, dodging and weaving. The Bronze defenders bunched up, trying to catch the running stallion.

This is exactly what the Limestone defenders had hoped for.

High above, Atsali, with Castela clinging to her back, went into action.

From a bag Castela took several paint grenades, and disassembling into a cluster of vines, took one in each tendril.

Atsali dived, arrowing down toward the pursuers, and yelled "GO!"

Castela jumped, spreading her vines for wind resistance. On a ballistic trajectory, she pulled and released the paint grenades, tossing them outward into a ring around the pursuers.

The grenades hit and went off, covering the majority of the Bronze team in Limestone paint. An anguished cry went up from the team and in the confusion Rowdy kept running, easily outdistancing the stragglers still pursuing.

Job done, Castela aimed for the tree in her path, disappearing into its branches with a WHOOSH! and a THUMP. Moments later, she emerged at the bottom and reassembled, sauntering casually past the paint-splattered Bronze team members, completely oblivious to their glares.

A whistle sounded - Rowdy had reached the Limestone base, and the game was over.

The victorious team gathered, hoisting Pickle to their shoulders for her gallant defense, as the Bronze team looked daggers at the winning team for their utterly batshit strategy. Soon enough, though, good manners and mood reasserted themselves and all of the teams gathered again, helping each other remove the paint they'd been hit with.

"OK, Next game..."
"The Empire was founded on cups of tea, mate, and if you think I am going to war without one you are sadly mistaken."

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lake_wrangler
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Re: Paintball madness

Post by lake_wrangler » Fri Sep 16, 2016 7:10 pm

Wow! That's like reading a prose version of the Whiteboard webcomic... :D

Well done! Looking forward to more! :D




Meanwhile, I just learned that Doc's name is quite the mouthful! :lol:

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jwhouk
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Re: Paintball madness

Post by jwhouk » Fri Sep 16, 2016 7:35 pm

Funny you should say that...

---

Nadette and Berdine relaxed a bit back at the tent after being called out in the second game.

"Hey, you remember that one uncle of ours, up in Alaska?" Nadette asked.

"Yes," Berdine replied, "and no, you are NOT calling him to see if he'd want to play. He'd bring that mustelidaemorph friend of his, and all hell would break loose."

"Well, duh." She rolled her eyes. "I'm not THAT dumb. I just remember that one airball game we tried to play."

"Tried is a good word to describe it," Berdine responded after wiping the last remnant of the previous game's paint off her. She handed the towel back to Edward, with a nod of thanks. "That weird looking ferret-morph got us both with only one shot."

"He didn't even have an autococker," Nadette mused as she shook a bit of paint off her right leg. "I don't think he shot more than five times the entire time we were out there."

"Yeah. That was a weird summer when we were up there."

"Yeah." Nadette looked out at the field. Her girlfriend was swooping up and away from a volley of paint coming from the far side of the tree line.

"I wonder what they're up to nowadays." She mused for a moment. "It's been so long since we were up there, I can't get a read on him."

"Hmph." Berdine stifled a laugh. "Probably cratering the parking lot of that paintball field. Or maybe he blew up the Kenai Peninsula making more of that Dew of his."

At this, both girls blanched.

"He was one weird duck, that's for sure," Nadette stated, laying back on her lounge chair.

"I thought his name was 'Doc'?" Berdine added.
"Character is what you are in the dark." - D.L. Moody
"You should never run from the voices in your head. That's how you give them power." - Jin

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Just Old Al
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Re: Paintball madness

Post by Just Old Al » Fri Sep 16, 2016 8:36 pm

Joe, did you pay hiim for that lead-in? :)
"The Empire was founded on cups of tea, mate, and if you think I am going to war without one you are sadly mistaken."

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Sgt. Howard
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Re: Paintball madness

Post by Sgt. Howard » Fri Sep 16, 2016 8:47 pm

He stole his first smooch yesterday
Rule 17 of the Bombay Golf Course- "You shall play the ball where the monkey drops it,"
I speak fluent Limrick-
the Old Sgt.

FreeFlier
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Re: Paintball madness

Post by FreeFlier » Fri Sep 16, 2016 9:44 pm

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
lake_wrangler wrote:Wow! That's like reading a prose version of the Whiteboard webcomic... :D
Indeed . . . except for the Mad Scientist Airsmith Bear . . . at least all in one person.

. . .

OTOH, what do Berdine and Nadette's parents do?
lake_wrangler wrote:Meanwhile, I just learned that Doc's name is quite the mouthful! :lol:
Just learned?

--FreeFlier

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Sgt. Howard
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Re: Paintball madness

Post by Sgt. Howard » Fri Sep 16, 2016 10:30 pm

Doc's first smooch http://www.the-whiteboard.com/autotwb2189.html
Regarding the bear's parent... Bernard Gadenyuva is a licensed Marriage Counselor who practices in St. Paul. His wife, Ursine, teaches English and French in the paranormal school district.
Rule 17 of the Bombay Golf Course- "You shall play the ball where the monkey drops it,"
I speak fluent Limrick-
the Old Sgt.

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Dave
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Re: Paintball madness

Post by Dave » Fri Sep 16, 2016 10:43 pm

jwhouk wrote:"Hey, you remember that one uncle of ours, up in Alaska?" Nadette asked.

"Yes," Berdine replied, "and no, you are NOT calling him to see if he'd want to play. He'd bring that mustelidaemorph friend of his, and all hell would break loose."
Indeed. I'd pay good money to see Al's face when he found that Roger had gotten into the shop and done a pentaborane conversion on Clara's motor. :lol:

FreeFlier
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Re: Paintball madness

Post by FreeFlier » Fri Sep 16, 2016 11:47 pm

That's better than some of the other things that can happen . . .

And there's still the question of the second wormhole gun.

--FreeFlier

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lake_wrangler
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Re: Paintball madness

Post by lake_wrangler » Sat Sep 17, 2016 3:08 am

FreeFlier wrote:OTOH, what do Berdine and Nadette's parents do?
lake_wrangler wrote:Meanwhile, I just learned that Doc's name is quite the mouthful! :lol:
Just learned?

--FreeFlier
Well, I don't remember reading it before, and I'm not always current on my bookmarked webcomics. So I just happened to catch up, last night, and ran across the comic I linked to, which had his full name in it.

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lake_wrangler
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Re: Paintball madness

Post by lake_wrangler » Sat Sep 17, 2016 3:12 am

Just Old Al wrote:Joe, did you pay hiim for that lead-in? :)
Ha! I wish!

(I could use it, for my upcoming bicycle trip to nowhere*...)



* So named, because for the first time in recent years, I am planning a trip where I don't have to reach "Point B" by a certain date, but rather will merely be enjoying riding a big loop, with an added extension if I have time, without any stress of reaching destination on time (the loop is guaranteed to not take up the two weeks I have available, which leaves me free to stop and visit any place at any time along the way, without worrying about running out of time).

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Just Old Al
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Re: Paintball madness

Post by Just Old Al » Sat Sep 17, 2016 6:30 am

Dave wrote:
jwhouk wrote:"Hey, you remember that one uncle of ours, up in Alaska?" Nadette asked.

"Yes," Berdine replied, "and no, you are NOT calling him to see if he'd want to play. He'd bring that mustelidaemorph friend of his, and all hell would break loose."
Indeed. I'd pay good money to see Al's face when he found that Roger had gotten into the shop and done a pentaborane conversion on Clara's motor. :lol:
That would be one VERY dead raccoon... Al does not take lightly to humor at that level. There would be a raccoon rug in Al's office at New Alexander...as a warning to others.
"The Empire was founded on cups of tea, mate, and if you think I am going to war without one you are sadly mistaken."

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