Two Screws Shy of a Picknick Basket

Moderators: Bookworm, starkruzr, MrFireDragon, PrettyPrincess, Wapsi

FreeFlier
Posts: 2492
Joined: Mon Oct 26, 2015 11:33 pm
Location: Land of the webbed feet

Re: Two Screws Shy of a Picknick Basket

Post by FreeFlier »

Hyperacute plumbism.

--FreeFlier
Warrl
Posts: 1723
Joined: Sat Jul 20, 2013 10:44 pm

Re: Two Screws Shy of a Picknick Basket

Post by Warrl »

Gingerninja wrote:How does shooting a sphinx give one tuberculosis???
Wrong interpretation of "consumption". In this case it is "being consumed".
User avatar
jwhouk
Posts: 6053
Joined: Wed Aug 01, 2012 7:58 am
Location: The Valley of the Sun, Arizona
Contact:

Re: Two Screws Shy of a Picknick Basket

Post by jwhouk »

---

"That was not a good idea, young man."

Jason turned around to see a huge... beast... sitting behind him, holding what was the remains of his gun in her taloned hand. With her other, she adjusted the glasses perched on her nose.

"So - why, exactly, were you just trying to shoot MY granddaughter?"

The last part of this sentence was uttered as she pulled Jason away from behind the billboard and directly to her face, her wings spread wide behind her and her tail wrapped around his right leg.
"Character is what you are in the dark." - D.L. Moody
"You should never run from the voices in your head. That's how you give them power." - Jin
User avatar
Sgt. Howard
Posts: 3331
Joined: Tue Jul 31, 2012 11:54 pm
Location: Malott, Washington

Re: Two Screws Shy of a Picknick Basket

Post by Sgt. Howard »

Mad interlude #1

"Now Phix, don't eat him until we get some answers, OK? If he needs encouragement, start with the legs and work up- I'll tourniquet as required,"
"Neil, Honey- STAY OUT OF THIS! I love you to pieces but I AM HANDELING THIS, ALRIGHT?"
"Certainly my dear, just a suggestion..."
"... why do you always have to make sense?" she exclaimed in an exasperated tone.
"It's a gift, I guess,"

... in other words, not part of the story, but cute...
Rule 17 of the Bombay Golf Course- "You shall play the ball where the monkey drops it,"
I speak fluent Limrick-
the Old Sgt.
FreeFlier
Posts: 2492
Joined: Mon Oct 26, 2015 11:33 pm
Location: Land of the webbed feet

Re: Two Screws Shy of a Picknick Basket

Post by FreeFlier »

Your basic feeling of "AW S__T!!!" :twisted:

--FreeFlier
Gingerninja
Posts: 22
Joined: Tue May 17, 2016 4:12 pm
Location: San Diego, California

Re: Two Screws Shy of a Picknick Basket

Post by Gingerninja »

Okay, maybe I AM insane Jason thought to himself. I'm being held by a giant cat...bird...woman..thing

Sphinx

"what?" Jason exclaimed

"I asked why you were just trying to shoot MY GRANDDAUGHTER" Phix yelled at him her feathers rustling.

"Wasn't talking to you"

A sphinx, a mythical guardian, often depicted with the head of a human and the body of a lion. Fond of riddles and guessing games, where those who answer wrongly are eaten and or killed

Jason was quiet for several seconds, trying to rationalize what was happening.

"ANSWER ME" Phix shook him violently

Jason reached into his pocket and grabbed his cigarettes, and lit one. "Because life isn't fair" he said exhaling

"Excuse me?"

"Two days ago your 'granddaughter' followed me to my house. She nor her companion made any effort i saw to identify themselves or their intentions. I defended myself, and what happens? I get the police, the Government and now monsters trying to capture me for something I didn't do."

Jason took another drag from his cigarette, "I know how the system works, they're the victims of some bullshit conspiracy and blah, blah blah. well guess what? NOT HAPPENING. I may end up dead, or being butt raped in jail but I will damn sure give them a reason to put me there, and not whatever double standard horse shit you've all cooked up." Throwing his cig at the creature.

Jason reached into his pocket again for his lighter and his hand brushed against his key ring. A thought occurred to him, he looked down. It was a long way to the ground. But maybe, just maybe....if this bluff worked, he began trying to take his keys off the ring unnoticed.

"Hey monster, I'm told you like riddles"

Phix narrowed her eyes at him

"When it goes up, it must come down. With Blinding light and booming sound when once at last upon the ground. And in it's wake lost souls be found......so...
what have I got in my pocket?"

Jason held up the Empty ring "give you a hint, it's NOT a ring of power." and Smiled his most vindictive grin he could manage.
Last edited by Gingerninja on Mon May 30, 2016 3:58 am, edited 1 time in total.
I would eat your soul, but I'd prefer to keep my lunch down.
Gingerninja
Posts: 22
Joined: Tue May 17, 2016 4:12 pm
Location: San Diego, California

Re: Two Screws Shy of a Picknick Basket

Post by Gingerninja »

Phix stared at Jason for several seconds "Nice try,...but there's no pinn."

"ooookay, plan B." Jason balled up his fist and swung as hard as he could aiming square for her nose. Several sharp snaps met with the popping of cartalidge.

The sphinx dropped him grabbing her now bleeding nose. "GAH, you arrogant little..."

The ground was rapidly approaching Jason, flailing aimlessly as he fell. "at least I got in one good punch"

get your feet under you, bend your legs. Brace yourself, but don't tense up

"what?"

DO IT

The grass rushed up to meet him as he closed his eyes and did as he was told. The impact barely registered, as though he'd hopped down off a chair.

RUN!!!

Jason tore off down the street. His lungs were burning and his hand ached. At least three of his fingers were broken and probably several of his ribs, but still he ran. One block, two blocks, he was going to get away. Jason could see the bushes he'd hid his bike in. He cut across the intersection

"the nightmare's almost over. We can make it, we just have to get away."

A horn blared deafeningly close. Jason turned to see the crosstown express barreling down on him. It wouldn't stop in time.
He looked back at his pursuers and smiled, his first real smile since this whole mess got started two days ago.
The impact shattered the bones of what remained of his upper torso. He couldn't stop laughing as the tires rolled over him liquefying and crushing every internal organ in his body. Jason stared up at the empty evening sky as the bus rolled over and past him. "I win, you fucking monsters. I win" He tried to laugh one more time, but there was too much blood. It came out as a gargled coughing. And everything went still.

This whole scene is too familiar for my taste doubt said as Monica walked over to the accident

"The irony isn't lost on me, I don't need your input thank you"

"So what now?" Shelly asked catching up with Monica

"Now? Now everything goes back to normal. At least as normal as this town ever gets"
I would eat your soul, but I'd prefer to keep my lunch down.
FreeFlier
Posts: 2492
Joined: Mon Oct 26, 2015 11:33 pm
Location: Land of the webbed feet

Re: Two Screws Shy of a Picknick Basket

Post by FreeFlier »

Uh . . . wasn't there a different ending yesterday?

--FreeFlier
Gingerninja
Posts: 22
Joined: Tue May 17, 2016 4:12 pm
Location: San Diego, California

Re: Two Screws Shy of a Picknick Basket

Post by Gingerninja »

Yes, yes there was. You are not wrong
I would eat your soul, but I'd prefer to keep my lunch down.
FreeFlier
Posts: 2492
Joined: Mon Oct 26, 2015 11:33 pm
Location: Land of the webbed feet

Re: Two Screws Shy of a Picknick Basket

Post by FreeFlier »

Ah. Thank you, I wasn't certain.

--FreeFlier
User avatar
lake_wrangler
Posts: 4300
Joined: Sun Aug 05, 2012 8:16 am
Location: Laval, Québec, Canada

Re: Two Screws Shy of a Picknick Basket

Post by lake_wrangler »

FreeFlier wrote:Uh . . . wasn't there a different ending yesterday?

--FreeFlier
Not only was that previous post different, yesterday, but it didn't even register to me as an end post...

I have to admit, I was a little disappointed with the re-write: I was hooked into the story, and was hoping for an eventual exorcism of some sort, via Monica's abilities. But hey, as long as I'm not the one writing, I have to right to demand anything... :P
It was still well executed, and the irony of his death was an interesting touch.

It was an interesting story. The various interactions of the various members of the original cast felt genuine.

I look forward to MOARRRR! ;)
Warrl
Posts: 1723
Joined: Sat Jul 20, 2013 10:44 pm

Re: Two Screws Shy of a Picknick Basket

Post by Warrl »

lake_wrangler wrote:Not only was that previous post different, yesterday, but it didn't even register to me as an end post...

I have to admit, I was a little disappointed with the re-write: I was hooked into the story, and was hoping for an eventual exorcism of some sort, via Monica's abilities. But hey, as long as I'm not the one writing, I have to right to demand anything... :P
It was still well executed, and the irony of his death was an interesting touch.

It was an interesting story. The various interactions of the various members of the original cast felt genuine.

I look forward to MOARRRR! ;)
Now we get to find out if he stays dead. And, if so, whether that actually slows him down.
User avatar
Hanineal
Posts: 37
Joined: Wed Aug 29, 2012 9:31 pm

Re: Two Screws Shy of a Picknick Basket

Post by Hanineal »

lake_wrangler wrote:
FreeFlier wrote:Uh . . . wasn't there a different ending yesterday?

--FreeFlier
Not only was that previous post different, yesterday, but it didn't even register to me as an end post...

I have to admit, I was a little disappointed with the re-write: I was hooked into the story, and was hoping for an eventual exorcism of some sort, via Monica's abilities. But hey, as long as I'm not the one writing, I have to right to demand anything... :P
It was still well executed, and the irony of his death was an interesting touch.

It was an interesting story. The various interactions of the various members of the original cast felt genuine.

I look forward to MOARRRR! ;)
While I certainly have no standing to criticize, I find this new ending to be a little cliche. It's a typical scene in many network dramas. I thought the original end entry was more original and had a lot more possibility for interesting development.

But, hey! Just my opinion...
What happens in the lab needs to stay in the lab... because it's such a bloody drag to have to rebuild civilization all over again.
User avatar
lake_wrangler
Posts: 4300
Joined: Sun Aug 05, 2012 8:16 am
Location: Laval, Québec, Canada

Re: Two Screws Shy of a Picknick Basket

Post by lake_wrangler »

Warrl wrote:Now we get to find out if he stays dead. And, if so, whether that actually slows him down.
I like the way you're thinking! :mrgreen:
Gingerninja
Posts: 22
Joined: Tue May 17, 2016 4:12 pm
Location: San Diego, California

Re: Two Screws Shy of a Picknick Basket

Post by Gingerninja »

Cold oblivion, that’s all Jason new. An ever expanding darkness, empty of sight or sound, cold gripping him as tightly as a serpent might its prey.

“So this is death” he felt himself speak.

No young-ling, it is something far worse. Death will never know of us...not while I still have power left. Not while I have claim...I will not be cheated of our bargain, your soul and meat are MINE.

Despair’s grating laughter echoed throughout the vast emptiness as searing agony racked through Jason. Unable to move, unable to scream he did the one thing he could.

Endure
I would eat your soul, but I'd prefer to keep my lunch down.
User avatar
Atomic
Posts: 2948
Joined: Tue Jul 31, 2012 12:39 am
Location: Central PA
Contact:

Re: Two Screws Shy of a Picknick Basket

Post by Atomic »

Finally got to read this all the way through -- good stuff!

I wonder if Tsilla will be stopping by to say.... something?
Don't let other peoples limitations become your constraints!

My Deviant Art scribbles
The Atomic Guide to Basic GIMP Stuff
Gingerninja
Posts: 22
Joined: Tue May 17, 2016 4:12 pm
Location: San Diego, California

Re: Two Screws Shy of a Picknick Basket

Post by Gingerninja »

“Hello ladies” Phix walked up behind Shelly and Monica “Everyone is unharmed I trust?”

“We’re fine Phix, thanks for asking” Monica watched as the paramedics zipped the young man's body bag closed.

Police started taking statements as reporters pulled up and began setting up equipment. Almost no one paid any attention to the group of figures following the body up to the ambulance, or tried to stop them as each touched the black heavy plastic, huddled together in the setting sun.

“I thought that demons were reassigned to different people when someone dies” Shelly broke the growing silence

Not if they’ve been punished, who knows what's going to happen to them cony said

“Shouldn’t we-” Shelly’s words were cut short. Before she could even finish her question they disappeared, like smoke in the wind.

“Like I said, as normal as this town gets.” Monica repeated “let’s go home”

===

The pain was fading, either it was lessening or Jason was just getting used to it. Either way he didn’t care, he still couldn’t see. Couldn't hear anything besides Despair’s voice when it decided to speak.

It is almost time.

“Time for what?”

Despair refused to answer any of Jason’s thoughts, and instead would chuckle of broken promises, of Death’s weakness, and of revenge for its confinement.

Soon youngling, very soon

A dull ache started at Jason’s shoulders and stretched to his chest, then down his gut. It felt like someone was rearranging his insides, removing them. The ache shifted to his head, a dull thumping sensation bouncing around his skull. Jason wished he could move, wished he could see. It felt like his skin was trying to crawl away, the cold didn't help, instead of numbing him it only sharpened his perception of every sensation. More throbbing aches sprang up. An intense pressure flowed down his limbs as if he was a toothpaste tube being emptied. Finally everything faded, no more aches or strains. Even the needling sensations on his skin stopped. Only the cold pressing on his back remained. Out of the darkness Jason thought he heard muffled voices and distant footsteps. He strained his senses, if his hearing had returned maybe, just maybe he could claw free of this abyss.

Wake up youngling and open our eyes, It’s time to leave
I would eat your soul, but I'd prefer to keep my lunch down.
Post Reply